AndysLife.org @AndysLifeorg

Keep updated with https://t.co/AX2TwGqc0C and the humorous ramblings that come forth from his(my) noggin. andyslife.org Kansas City Joined April 2012

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AndysLife.org @AndysLifeorg

a year ago

@CraigWeekend @riehle_deal I look forward to this weekly. Thanks for your dedicated service.

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AndysLife.org @AndysLifeorg

2 years ago

@mendozay0929 @engineers_feed "The thing can go fast. Real fast. You just can't be big."

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Katharine Hepburn, in her own words: "Once, when I was a teenager, my father and I were standing in line to buy tickets for the circus. Finally, there was only one family between us and the ticket counter. That family made a lasting impression on me. There were eight children, all under the age of 12. From the way they were dressed, you could tell they didn’t have much money, but their clothes were clean, very clean. The children were well-behaved, standing in pairs behind their parents, holding hands. They were so excited about the clowns, the animals, and all the acts they would see that night. From their excitement, you could tell they had never been to a circus before. It was going to be a highlight of their lives. The father and mother stood proudly at the front of their little group. The mother was holding her husband’s hand, looking at him as if to say, 'You’re my knight in shining armor.' He was smiling, enjoying seeing his family happy. The ticket lady asked how many tickets he wanted, and he proudly responded, 'I want eight children’s tickets and two adult tickets.' Then she announced the price. The wife let go of her husband’s hand, her head dropped, and the man’s lip began to quiver. He leaned in closer and asked, 'How much did you say?' The ticket lady repeated the price. He didn’t have enough money. How was he supposed to turn around and tell his eight kids that he couldn’t afford to take them to the circus? Seeing what was happening, my dad reached into his pocket, pulled out a $20 bill, and dropped it on the ground. We weren’t rich by any means. My father bent down, picked up the $20 bill, tapped the man on the shoulder, and said, 'Excuse me, sir, this fell out of your pocket.' The man understood what was happening. He wasn’t being handed charity, but he gratefully accepted the help in his desperate, heartbreaking, and embarrassing situation. He looked straight into my father’s eyes, took my dad’s hand in both of his, squeezed the bill tightly, and with trembling lips and a tear streaming down his cheek, he replied, 'Thank you, sir. This really means so much to me and my family.' My father and I went back to our car and drove home. The $20 my dad gave away was what we had planned to use for our own tickets. Although we didn’t see the circus that night, we felt a joy inside us that was far greater than seeing the circus. That day, I learned the true value of giving. The Giver is greater than the Receiver. If you want to be great, greater than life itself, learn to give. Love has nothing to do with what you expect to get, only with what you expect to give—everything. The importance of giving and blessing others cannot be overstated because there is always joy in giving. Learn to make someone happy through acts of giving." — Katharine Hepburn

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Gail Simone 💙💛 @GailSimone

6 years ago

Me watching Bake-off: You fool! You can’t dip the walnut whirl in the tempered chocolate, you have to drizzle over the top to achieve the characteristic wobble of the coffee ganache, Parisian cafe-style! Me baking at home: I forgot to put apples in the apple pie

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Jim Gaffigan @JimGaffigan

2 years ago

I post this every year on 9-11. No words. #remebering911

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Randall Munroe @xkcd

2 years ago

Good and Bad Ideas xkcd.com/2929

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AndysLife.org @AndysLifeorg

2 years ago

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Mendoza @mendozay0929

2 years ago

The presenters are starting to look more and more like the people from the Hunger Games capitol

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AndysLife.org @AndysLifeorg

2 years ago

@theaceofspaeder @mendozay0929 I can hear the 2015 World Series all over again.

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AndysLife.org @AndysLifeorg

3 years ago

Frank Sumatra's Christmas song Mistletoe and Holly has a lyric "giving the tree the trim" and I can only assume it's 100% mob vernacular for some reason.

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Keaton Patti @KeatonPatti

8 years ago

I forced a bot to watch over 1,000 hours of Hallmark Christmas movies and then asked it to write a Hallmark Christmas movie of its own. Here is the first page.

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Randall Munroe @xkcd

3 years ago

Parameterball xkcd.com/2852

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AndysLife.org @AndysLifeorg

3 years ago

@mendozay0929 Just because you can doesn't mean you should.

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AndysLife.org @AndysLifeorg

3 years ago

I'm at my sons flag football practice and I kid you not, the coach yells 'whistle' just like Roy Kent in Ted Lasso.

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AndysLife.org @AndysLifeorg

3 years ago

I forgot the word 'tater tot' today and instead used 'hash brown cylinder'.

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Massimo @Rainmaker1973

3 years ago

The Gyro-X two-wheeled car from 1967 was balanced by the whirling, beachball-sized gyroscope tucked under its hood [full video: buff.ly/3AfqZyS]

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AndysLife.org @AndysLifeorg

3 years ago

I love automating things around my house with consumer grade equipment or DIY like the ESP8266. What's the most useless automation running here? Ask Alexa to turn on "hello" and she'll turn on a neon light above the bed that says 'hello'.