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Tweets137K
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Followers16K
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Following6K
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Likes144K
.Good Morning Green Room Of The Jerry Springer Twitterville
Behind every strong sexy woman there's a man poking her in the butt with a boner
Good morning to anyone who didn't have sex last night! The rest of you can go fuck yourselves! Wait, what?
When he plays with your nipples it's called manipulation, right? Right?
Sexy lingerie is way hotter than nudes Do not @ me!
I have nothing in common with people
*gets my hopes up* Hope: "put me down"
find yourself a guy who texts you back as fast as he comes
I don't drink a lot, but when I do, I scream sing Flagpole Sitta and mess up the words.
Welcome to your 50s! Not only do you have pill sorters, but their labels are worn clear off.
I can't decide if I was this depraved when I got here or if you all made me this way.
if you’re fighting a fight in your heart that you just can’t talk about, i’m sending you hugs
Since we've broken up, there are questions that come to mind, like "Who will I dress up as a Playboy bunny for, now?"
You can never have too much ~ hoarder’s motto ~ whore’s motto …and also words to live by
Kids these days do not know the terror 70’s parents engendered with just a withering stare.
Gisele probably made Tom put together an IKEA bookcase and he was like “fuck this…where’s my helmet?”
What good is a bestie if you can't unload your psychological sewage on them.
me: whatcha thinking about? him (wondering if we have enough cheese to last the week): just thinking about how beautiful you are
Bö Jänke: Hönkÿ @Bob_Janke
45K Followers 8K Following Fancy Pants raconteur I write this for fun https://t.co/heH4IlJcMx I know who DB Cooper is
Marcmywords @Marcmywords2
54K Followers 47K Following Tweeting Live From The Capital Of The Who Dat Nation.
Boyd's Backyard™ @TheBoydP
101K Followers 18K Following I’d rather be working on my yard. #envydastrength I retweet regular people. My tweets are here: https://t.co/zOIJ18SHBV
Tony P. @Tbone7219
52K Followers 18K Following
C’est La Vie @Robert_Beau
54K Followers 47K Following Real Deal ~ Part Time Penis Model ~ Full Time Asshole
sixfootcandy @sixfootcandy
51K Followers 6K Following Gen Xer with opinions, observations, and a sense of humor. Loves animals more than most people. LA 📍
The B. @anerdonfire2
41K Followers 12K Following My thoughts were full of other things when I wandered off the path. Dante Alighieri, Inferno
Dan Regan @DanRegan_Comedy
23K Followers 6K Following Winner - America's Funniest People [email protected]
Annie Hatfield @AnneHatfieldVO
47K Followers 6K Following Tall, pale, relentlessly cheerful. https://t.co/1tLBuSYH1g
Ivsy @Ivsy01
37K Followers 8K Following drinking slurpees in front of 7-eleven with @The_Getawaygirl My thoughts in a box. my tweets 🤦♀️ https://t.co/0g8VMFzt2k
Alfie @DownFrontArtist
53K Followers 42K Following There is no show without business. https://t.co/X2EN341vnk
Destry @DestryBrod
19K Followers 15K Following Not quite cool enough to be Canadian.I live close enough to Canada to smell the healthcare. Pretty liberal, pretty democratic not that pretty tho. pro choice.
Stefan Urquelle @OfficeofSteve
24K Followers 9K Following It's ticklish when you touch my shoes https://t.co/NcqURETrPU
Benny Boy @Camel_Crushin
17K Followers 7K Following
Daz? @HomeProbably
22K Followers 5K Following Writer. I had a short story published once but now I’m here. Tweets: https://t.co/kCgwb1u1LC #YNWA
@[email protected]... @JonBaker
13K Followers 10K Following Gamer, geek, Mensan, and lover of all things comedy. Creator of the webcomic Alarmingly Bad (@AlarminglyBad)
Lisa, Duchess of Netf... @MsLisaM
28K Followers 4K Following movies. music. cats. pistachios. laughter.
melanie ✨ @melaauvlnmh9
26 Followers 868 Following 18 🧬 need a content partner this week 🌶 only replying here ⬇️
Fluxed @Fluxedsocial
28 Followers 335 Following FLUXED ⚡️ The opposite of static. Defined by the carve, the line, and the pocket. For those who thrive in the zone. 🏂🚵🌊 Join Us: https://t.co/kFcsDEfWxR
Pey 🤍 | OF & NSFW @PeySheThicc
85 Followers 142 Following Thick thighs, filthy mind 🍑 💦 Selling customs, GFE, private videos, and more 💋 Come play… if you can handle it
Yazeed @Yazeed3was
3 Followers 125 Following ﴿ الله لطيف بعباده ﴾ حتى لو خانتك اختياراتك ، لن يخونك لطف الله
Benzodiazepines @Castro8651Jane
1 Followers 29 Following follow us on our website for more information https://t.co/jIoXY15ivt
Alan Felyk @AlanFelyk
142K Followers 70K Following Author of the Infinity's Trinity series—two science fiction/romance/humor novels on Amazon. https://t.co/bSsYzoYscb
🦋🟦📌 fhqwhgad... @futureofradtime
517 Followers 2K Following i wish to be alive in AD 2101 to see the Zero Wing references-Autistic -check link- followbacks unless NSFW since i’m 17 -cis he/him - 🇦🇺 white - 6’1
problem @problem86107855
37 Followers 304 Following
Michael Galley St 1 @MichaelGalley12
550 Followers 4K Following Air condition Engineering; follow me to see more things about Air condition service installation and many more ; thank you🖕🖕🖕🖕🖕
The Anxious Cat 𓃠 @iPhonePhobic
2K Followers 5K Following A broken brain, a box full of badge pins, and a PS4 .. Let me have a smoke and come back to you on this.
Ron the Robot 🇸�... @robot_ron
707 Followers 7K Following “I think, therefore I am” — René Descartes. ~~~~ Just a regular human being behind an avatar. Trying to generate life, honesty, and humor. From the Bay to LA
Litecoin Lisa 🇺�... @lisamightydavis
18K Followers 7K Following Believer Patriot Mother Freedom Warrior VeTest Creator https://t.co/WeV4Z05yCf or https://t.co/bqpVHJ3g6y
lena @lena01009632
21 Followers 299 Following
Muddasir Khan @Muddasi04956046
79 Followers 4K Following
🏈💛❤ChiefsChic... @tacobella_89
1K Followers 4K Following I'm just a country girl who loves bonfires, woods, creeks, picnics on blankets, the sounds of nature and fishing.
Dr_Grumbles 🪄🏴�... @Tha_StrangeDr_
3K Followers 5K Following Understanding is an art and not everyone is an artist. A vessel and an anchor, porch satyr #Úlfhéðnar #DragonSoul #MagicInAMeatSuit,
Ashleigh 🎼 @Lees4Peace
7K Followers 7K Following Chasing a white rabbit, hoping to find Wonderland! Lets go an Adventure?🌈 https://t.co/d25j0hzRze
Amber Joan @tired_cna61
231 Followers 2K Following
Pavankumar Pavankumar @Pavanku56720220
12 Followers 1K Following
dangerfloof @BrightsidesWife
4K Followers 4K Following life is love, joy, chaos, peace, humour and pain. artist. advocate for mental health, cptsd and autism 💙
𝓜iccie @miccie_22
2K Followers 4K Following
Elizabeth @Blow_brew
266 Followers 2K Following
NFT Soton team @Sudyod8
30 Followers 511 Following
TheMentalRecess @amentalrecess
17K Followers 3K Following Everyone needs a mind recess. https://t.co/ac4wrIUlsW
st€v€urk€l @xandermann
51 Followers 2K Following Nepper/Schlepper/Bauernfänger, Volkskünstlerin auf hohem Niveau, Norbert Lammert Ultra ⚖️🦾🤌🏻
Coveredinbacon @CrystalSecrist
459 Followers 2K Following my blood type is O positive for Bacon.. nature is my religion & apparently ignorance is bliss and I'm surrounded by stupid people.
JOE COOL @JoeCoolTM
1K Followers 2K Following
🍁 B.L.T. 🔥 🇨... @Royal_BLT
1K Followers 2K Following Easy going, experienced Canuck (Canadian YYC) enjoys Hockey (Flames), Baseball, Golf, Flying Liverpool FC & CFL. Son & Daughter (twins) & Grandaughter .
Anthony Tuan Nguyen @AnthonyTuanNguy
1K Followers 4K Following
ROB ROTH @RobRoth18
2K Followers 4K Following BLM, LGBT Rights.Musician, Atheist, Art Lover, Progressive Democrat. PRO CHOICE and damned proud of it.
Marianne @MarianneSansum
51K Followers 47K Following # A Joint Heir# We walk by Faith Not by Sight,..Worked in the media.(not any more)..Love animals...Tweets not always my opinion,..No DM'S please
Bess Byers @MIA_Cannabis
1K Followers 4K Following LICENSE GROWER AND SUPPLIER 🧤 SHIPPING WORLD WIDE...! imcanna🥰🧾https://t.co/qrIPeeEkho [email protected]
. @squirrelenjoyer
2K Followers 816 Following just came for the sports news. y'all motherfuckers need Jesus
Angelina Faith🖤⛓ @Cemetery_Lover
503 Followers 1K Following 21, Reptile mom, cat mom, bookworm, stoner, witchy vibes 🖤🦎🕸🍄⛓📚
Rose @Rose85293409
31 Followers 147 Following
Carmella Cannoli @piccolobutt
15K Followers 4K Following I like long walks through the liquor store & beets. Pleasantly oblivious. https://t.co/UPLdA35eHN
Dad’s Mad @ShagNeverLied
117 Followers 963 Following Life’s weird as hell, I’m all the way here for it
Bö Jänke: Hönkÿ @Bob_Janke
45K Followers 8K Following Fancy Pants raconteur I write this for fun https://t.co/heH4IlJcMx I know who DB Cooper is
Marcmywords @Marcmywords2
54K Followers 47K Following Tweeting Live From The Capital Of The Who Dat Nation.
Boyd's Backyard™ @TheBoydP
101K Followers 18K Following I’d rather be working on my yard. #envydastrength I retweet regular people. My tweets are here: https://t.co/zOIJ18SHBV
Tony P. @Tbone7219
52K Followers 18K Following
C’est La Vie @Robert_Beau
54K Followers 47K Following Real Deal ~ Part Time Penis Model ~ Full Time Asshole
sixfootcandy @sixfootcandy
51K Followers 6K Following Gen Xer with opinions, observations, and a sense of humor. Loves animals more than most people. LA 📍
The B. @anerdonfire2
41K Followers 12K Following My thoughts were full of other things when I wandered off the path. Dante Alighieri, Inferno
Dan Regan @DanRegan_Comedy
23K Followers 6K Following Winner - America's Funniest People [email protected]
Annie Hatfield @AnneHatfieldVO
47K Followers 6K Following Tall, pale, relentlessly cheerful. https://t.co/1tLBuSYH1g
Ivsy @Ivsy01
37K Followers 8K Following drinking slurpees in front of 7-eleven with @The_Getawaygirl My thoughts in a box. my tweets 🤦♀️ https://t.co/0g8VMFzt2k
Doug Bies @dougbies
18K Followers 901 Following New York Jets fan, poker player, Instagram, Snapchat, & Untappd: dougbies
Alfie @DownFrontArtist
53K Followers 42K Following There is no show without business. https://t.co/X2EN341vnk
Destry @DestryBrod
19K Followers 15K Following Not quite cool enough to be Canadian.I live close enough to Canada to smell the healthcare. Pretty liberal, pretty democratic not that pretty tho. pro choice.
Jack Boot @IamJackBoot
13K Followers 984 Following The New Yorker, Vanity Fair, The Atlantic, Harper's, Rolling Stone. I've read some of these magazines.
Stefan Urquelle @OfficeofSteve
24K Followers 9K Following It's ticklish when you touch my shoes https://t.co/NcqURETrPU
Benny Boy @Camel_Crushin
17K Followers 7K Following
Daz? @HomeProbably
22K Followers 5K Following Writer. I had a short story published once but now I’m here. Tweets: https://t.co/kCgwb1u1LC #YNWA
Wambui Kihugi @kihugi
3K Followers 5K Following Every day is a new beggining. Treat it thatway; Stay away from what might have been, and look at what can be....😊 https://t.co/EHboRUbWQt
Heyitsjudedagain @Heyitsjudeagain
1K Followers 204 Following Starting again, just for fun and banter, had it with my other account!
Princess Patrushka @SomeBitch911
980 Followers 4K Following Named 2024 Apparent Instigator Extraordinaire at your sevice but at my leisure. Word. Rock on.
NG🇨🇦🚜 @Northerngent4
13K Followers 6K Following I’m here to share laughs. rarely serious. friend, father and husband. It’s your body do what you want.Co-creator of #BitchSyrup, I’m soUrry.
🐚 @VikingBut
5K Followers 3K Following I really have no idea what I'm doing here @desert_musings is the best. @[email protected] on Mastodon, https://t.co/uXt3dC7Yx3 on discord
A poorly put together... @OGPoutyMcgee
6K Followers 4K Following If you are what you wish you could eat then I’m Tom Selleck’s fat ol’ dick.
PurplePissFlaps @indigo_raven_
26K Followers 2K Following Peecan Sandies Cult I specialize in testing the limits and pushing buttons. Main account 👉🏼@turtledumplin
You’re the worst @OMGSoOverIt
11K Followers 3K Following You’re the worst. https://t.co/D3hdAZSjyi https://t.co/6N7eKKGuVq
Brother Ben @SentenceReduced
10K Followers 9K Following #BillsMafia Gooble Gobble, One Of Us... https://t.co/WSm1eoBPQs)
Giggles @GigglesIsBack
6K Followers 4K Following Be water. Empty your mind. Be formless, shapeless- like water. You put water into a cup, it becomes the cup. You put water into a bottle it becomes the bottle.
Ⓜ️isterD @MisterD78UK
10K Followers 5K Following This is a page of silly and fun, enjoy fav tweets - https://t.co/ZTBRD9FUz8
Pesu @pickadrafta
9 Followers 358 Following
Dr Pessimus Prime, ra... @BigJDubz
16K Followers 1K Following A robot idiot Header by @gotjbenny Avi by @lincnotfound Some twits I dun https://t.co/qaAiMsS2T8
Dr. Jeff Computers @JeffMyspace
5K Followers 4K Following Opinions are not my own. I have no control over tweets; all living things exist without reason. https://t.co/LkXHTi67ey
Trash Pandamonium Con... @ContestThursday
2K Followers 1K Following Weekly Thursday contest, 10AM - 10 PM EDT. Magical AF. New Themes Every Week. Open to all size accounts. Contest artwork by @RiotGrlErin.
SupremeStaffing @StaffingLLC
771 Followers 2K Following Supreme Service Staffing Solution is the Site For You . One Stop Shopping For Your Staffing Needs
Your Best Nightmare �... @YourBestNight3
12K Followers 9K Following I’m sorry you found your way here
Angie thinks ur amazi... @angiethinksFFS
13K Followers 12K Following *Not a life coach* Terms subject to change, without notice. Breast Cancer, got me. 🙏 https://t.co/JhxCSvsweO
Uńo @owenhabel2
30K Followers 29K Following | Writer | #Afritondo Shortlist, 2026 | #Brittlepaper | Elsewhere
this.bitch. @kylawri11984903
88 Followers 259 Following
Kat Ballou’s fragme... @1ChasingReality
2K Followers 2K Following Living one wish at a time. https://t.co/blVRgmxQwO
Nicole @HemlockAndRose
2K Followers 2K Following . Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead is purely coincidental. 99.9% RT's
smerobin @smerobin
6K Followers 1K Following I'm not sure how I got here but I'm pretty sure I carried a watermelon.
Christina, mother of ... @Aikiwomannc
5K Followers 2K Following BLM. Inked nerd w/ADHD 🤘 Tool Slipknot Sleep Token Architects - Somehow had tweets in @Newsweek @ThePoke @Cheezburger Avi by @RiotGrlErin 🎃 Always Halloween
Just Serena @kidnapped_jesus
5K Followers 2K Following Stupid piece of bitch trash. Freelance man fighter. She/Her. https://t.co/2YK6Qr0Pcn
Cycloptomese @Cycloptomese
5K Followers 2K Following goddammit It ain't much but it's honest penetration. Secretly Keanu
Leah Capezzuto @LeahCapezzuto
3K Followers 1K Following I’m a lover of all things desirable; music, words, art, dark humor, people.
LiLipoot @LiLiPoot_J2
2K Followers 2K Following
Misty @Misty_Lynn_R
436 Followers 1K Following
Dollface @dollfaceiam
3K Followers 2K Following Gratuitous whateverness. I'm Mrs @erroneous_me 💯 always https://t.co/m3aemZS9rY
stacia mariw @MariwStacia
1K Followers 2K Following Single, great sense of humor, loving life, loyal, compassionate and believe in myself. Mother of two beautiful, strong daughters. No DM
D-Level StarFoxer @OftenFunnyFoxer
827 Followers 1K Following https://t.co/nITUJf1kRT You think you're worthless but the Space Jam website guest book is still active venmo: AlexFoxboi
Sho’Nuff @numeri33
8K Followers 6K Following Always chillin’. Bacon is life! AZ Wildcats 4-Life. BTFD from Bill’s Country.
Gigi K @gigi_k1
6K Followers 2K Following A cheeky bitch from the land of candy 🍬🍭 Fuck you, It's my unicorn https://t.co/kxwnH5pRB7
Paige @paigeofmylife2
3K Followers 2K Following Please don't tell my boyfriend about this account and please don't tell my husband about my boyfriend.
🖤 Just Heather �... @weedswildflowrs
10K Followers 3K Following Just an #AuDHD witchy mom. #LGBTQ #bi and ally. Disabled and #scoliosisstrong This is a safe space. 🏳️🌈🏳️⚧️
WotWot F@ck @mtlyxru4
3K Followers 6K Following High Class Trailer Trash, leave me alone! Just here for amusement really. Trump all the way! No DM'S


































