osseous matter @ManCaveSM
Retweeter of Tweets, blogger at https://t.co/5psz4MnoZB liveandletblog.com Orlando, FL Joined March 2009-
Tweets14K
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Followers14K
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Following16K
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Likes15K
osseous matter retweeted
Why do we have 2 nostrils and not just one big one
osseous matter retweeted
In Germany, prairie dogs are called prairie wurst.
osseous matter retweeted
I'm about a nut length away from asshole
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masturbating to classical music, call that ludwig van beet-off-en
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Made a sandwich with my left hand so it felt like someone else was doing it
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I like to sit on my recliner and pretend I’m a chairman.
osseous matter retweeted
ignoring massive rectal bleeding because not a symptom of COVID
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Times are tough. There isn’t even enough traffic on the streets for me to walk into.
osseous matter retweeted
The lengths people will go to run a marathon.
osseous matter retweeted
Flaming hot Doritos are just crispy laxatives.
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Putting my quarantine report card on the fridge. Sleeping B+ Drinking A+ Eating A Hygiene C-
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My new favourite part of every morning is re-sleep
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Me: I think I’ll start working out today Also me: I got off the couch that’s enough exercise for the day
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I talk a big game about having enough toilet paper, but in reality I've always been a bit curious about adult diapers
osseous matter retweeted
It’s like my grandma used to say, Cotton is the fabric of our britches and syrup glues pancakes together
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