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Followers2K
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Following1K
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Likes37K
Slappy retweeted
You scream! I scream! We all scream! …I put my shirt back on
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Slappy retweeted
The reason Europeans don't have air conditioning is that we live in caves, are afraid of technology and, at our last continent-wide goat sacrifice, the entrails foretold that AC would bring us nothing but bad fortune and poor harvests.
Slappy retweeted
This year I would like to befriend a crow
Slappy retweeted
I'm talkin to myself again I can relate to that, my friend
i can’t watch someone sleep without checking their chest
i’m an open book. one page is glued shut and it’s going to stay that way
Slappy retweeted
when i don't have any retweets between my tweets i look like a crazy person
i keep a running list of things i’ll do when i’m ready and the list is also not ready
the american dream is currently on hold please listen to the following options
america is a WebMD page that keeps redirecting to guns
Slappy retweeted
My cutoff game is so strong I quit talking to myself one time.
Slappy retweeted
Yall got any more of that “dopamine”?
Slappy retweeted
…i‘m using european scales because i‘m european ?
Slappy retweeted
not to be a slut, but I just wanna nap with you on the couch
It is literally illegal under Janteloven for me to answer this question.
Do Scandinavian people know they’re hot or do they just think they’re average because they’re all so hot
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