Steak Fever @SteakFever
i drive a subaru forester and consequently am now bi sexual. Joined September 2013-
Tweets272
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Followers14
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Following10
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Likes20
if a teacher told me that if i licked her butt hole to get an A, i'd already have an A.
considering buying a @fleshlight for this white elephant party i'm going to and then selecting my own gift. #powermove
my favorite date spot is the hampstead train station museum. that places gets my engine going, poon 4 days.
is it socially acceptable to right swipe your sister on tinder?
all my gf talks about is Harry Potter, but all I want to talk about is my hairy pooper. #FantasticBeast
st. patty's day weekend is coming up. I wonder which one of my friends will get lost, get arrested, or end up in the hospital this year.
how I walk up to girls on vday. #theywantme
Parisa wouldn't let me poop in the bathroom this morning, she made me go dig a hole in the yard. jokes on her, I love pooping in the yard
I once had a girl tell me that she just wanted to stare at my ball sack for while. #scrotforest #watchmewatchmyballsmove
if I keep farting in my bed I'm going to give myself pink eye.
got a bj from a hobo and after I finished I asked him if he wanted some money for food and he said, "nah, I've had enough steak for one day"
I think it's interesting that some girls turn down head. I'm not sure there has ever been a dude that has turned down a bj from a nice lady
I don't always get thrown out of bars but when I do it's escorted by 2 security guards. #lit #theforceawoke #tittytwister #powerballs
C's are kind of like dry handjobs, you don't want to admit you've gotten one and they kinda sting.
it's finals week, aka you can find me holed up in the lib unshaved and unshowered for the foreseeable future. #crackstank #get@mepus
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