Thomas @TheeDankEngine

Stand-Up Comedic Connoisseur. Husband. Father. Child at Heart. Aspiring Ghost Writer. Dead Inside. Most of my tweets are written on the toilet. Joined September 2020

Tweets

2K
Followers

673
Following

2K
Likes

3K

Thomas @TheeDankEngine

5 years ago

@Obsidian_Blue @rochephillips :*

Thomas @TheeDankEngine

5 years ago

Fun fact: Male honeybees die shortly after sex. It's 3 stages of life are literally 1. Honey 2. Nut 3. Cheerio

Thomas @TheeDankEngine

5 years ago

@lawyerup17 @zachsilberberg sar·casm /ˈsärˌkazəm/ noun the use of irony to mock or convey contempt. "his voice, hardened by sarcasm, could not hide his resentment"

Thomas @TheeDankEngine

5 years ago

@OrlandoPcomedy I'mma Puke After

Thomas @TheeDankEngine

5 years ago

My first viral tweet was a stolen joke. All the comments are so mad.

Thomas @TheeDankEngine

5 years ago

@Blk_Dolphin @RF_P0TUS No.

Thomas @TheeDankEngine

5 years ago

@hughfriknfraser Cool man!

Thomas @TheeDankEngine

5 years ago

@bayouballyhoo Never once said it was mine! But if you can find the original author of the joke, let me know, I'll give credit where credit is due.

Thomas @TheeDankEngine

5 years ago

@dspiro1997 Steal what I stole? Sure!

Thomas @TheeDankEngine

5 years ago

@BetterCall_Joel @mlebischak It was in jest. Like "oh man you got me"

Mat™️ @futureKid

5 years ago

Matchbox Twenty + Twenty One Pilots = Sum 41

millennial_crybaby_slob @dillonsaur

5 years ago

Every rich person has a tiny dog that looks exactly like a monopoly player piece

Thomas @TheeDankEngine

5 years ago

@zachsilberberg Shit. I've been beat to the punch

Orlando @OrlandoPcomedy

5 years ago

You mean to tell me someone Ironed a Maiden?

Al Alvarez One Liners @AlAlvarezJokes

5 years ago

7/8ths of the time i believe in god But sometimes I'm an eighth-eist

Mike Wells @mikewtfwells

5 years ago

My idea of being able to afford a home renovation is playing The Sims.

Morgan Gallo @morgangcomedy

5 years ago

Do people not realize when they complain about having to pay to see a comedy show it’s kind of insulting to the comics? These jokes aren’t free bitch

Thomas @TheeDankEngine

5 years ago

I had sex on the beach once, so I totally get where Anakin was coming from.

Mike Wells @mikewtfwells

5 years ago

It’s so easy to order $50 worth of Taco Bell when you’re also buying weed.

Thomas @TheeDankEngine

5 years ago

UPDATE: Saw fast 9 and ordered that lady a few self help books on Amazon. Then I took the wallet to the police station.

Not funny, just weird. Specializing in childless dad jokes.

WJ Reid @WJReid3

3K Followers 2K Following Not funny, just weird. Specializing in childless dad jokes.

Christian Hedonist | Florida Supremacist | Southern Cosmopolitan | Side Splitters Regular | Classy Degenerate | Liberal Elitist | Blue Collar Scholar

The Big Crunch Theory @CrunchCardwell

2K Followers 2K Following Christian Hedonist | Florida Supremacist | Southern Cosmopolitan | Side Splitters Regular | Classy Degenerate | Liberal Elitist | Blue Collar Scholar

nevertheless she locked in | standup | sketches | relatable traumatized girl📍NYC | host of Sad Girl Survival Guide | see me live 🎟️ in bio

glennis ❤️‍🔥 @theglennisshow

10K Followers 885 Following nevertheless she locked in | standup | sketches | relatable traumatized girl📍NYC | host of Sad Girl Survival Guide | see me live 🎟️ in bio

charles entertainment... @jmurffff

18K Followers 1K Following chaotic rat

certified california junior ranger (she/her). stupid sense of humor but interesting takes. Frodo Baggins stan account. IG @itssarahdutcher

Sarah @sarahoftherings

5K Followers 1K Following certified california junior ranger (she/her). stupid sense of humor but interesting takes. Frodo Baggins stan account. IG @itssarahdutcher

This is hard because I want to be myself, but I also want you to like me. instagram @tedbartoncomedy for stand up clips

Ted Barton @TedBartonComedy

11K Followers 8K Following This is hard because I want to be myself, but I also want you to like me. instagram @tedbartoncomedy for stand up clips

Live and let live. Will mute/block nazi bitches.

Marcus @Syrik_Zero

813 Followers 551 Following Live and let live. Will mute/block nazi bitches.

I don't need no iron, I'm already creased. Married to the gravel. #FreePalestine

SIC SEMPER MARK ASS B... @TheGhostOfJohnM

1K Followers 1K Following I don't need no iron, I'm already creased. Married to the gravel. #FreePalestine

out of pocket bc my pants don't have any. NYC, Comedian, Writer, Gamer, Guitar Center bully, Jewish af | words in @PaletteSwapMag @Reductress & @HardDriveMag

Iris 💫 @Jest_Iris

16K Followers 2K Following out of pocket bc my pants don't have any. NYC, Comedian, Writer, Gamer, Guitar Center bully, Jewish af | words in @PaletteSwapMag @Reductress & @HardDriveMag

Your ghostwriter’s ghostwriter.

ANTHONY ZUCCARO @externaljew

1K Followers 863 Following Your ghostwriter’s ghostwriter.

poet laureate of cashew milk | songwriter | weirdo | she & her | MFA in Poetry

Julia Rapp 💙 @jujujulife

2K Followers 1K Following poet laureate of cashew milk | songwriter | weirdo | she & her | MFA in Poetry

flaviusvalens @flaviusvalens1

8K Followers 9K Following Some guy

Stand Up Comedian in Boston

Jay Martin @steak_jones

8K Followers 7K Following Stand Up Comedian in Boston

~bad comedian/average waiter~ “top 100 Twitter account under 1k followers”—US Weekly

gabeybabyyyy @GabrielYassky

860 Followers 647 Following ~bad comedian/average waiter~ “top 100 Twitter account under 1k followers”—US Weekly

Pittsburgh Comedian and Video Connoisseur. Technically a paid professional. Still waiting for Vine to come back.

Will Schreiner @Beeshrine

2K Followers 1K Following Pittsburgh Comedian and Video Connoisseur. Technically a paid professional. Still waiting for Vine to come back.

Brought board shorts into fashion mid 80’s. knows the Mexican Elvis- El Vez. Was Mojo Nixon’s neighbor. See my bad art on IG @carnell_royale

carnell Royale @brokendowndart

2K Followers 1K Following Brought board shorts into fashion mid 80’s. knows the Mexican Elvis- El Vez. Was Mojo Nixon’s neighbor. See my bad art on IG @carnell_royale

Duncan Kituri @Keyturi

236 Followers 1K Following

Cedrick jeff @Cedrickjeff

17 Followers 414 Following

Responsibility better than privilege 💥💥Man United any day ❤

BMM @Motanya_K

766 Followers 3K Following Responsibility better than privilege 💥💥Man United any day ❤

socially awkward potato.

Manisha Katyal @lazybonee01

82 Followers 439 Following socially awkward potato.

15-30% Monthly | 2 High-Conviction Stocks.Short-Term Gains: 15-20% in Days/Weeks.DM

InflationTrade🇺�... @Rauvu8728

37 Followers 2K Following 15-30% Monthly | 2 High-Conviction Stocks.Short-Term Gains: 15-20% in Days/Weeks.DM "JOIN" for WhatsApp Alerts. Live Trade Signals • Market Analysis

#Crypto_enthusiast 💰#investor 📈 #Global_influencer 🌍. #Contributor//@Gate @Potatoswap @Goblin @Yellow @ShareX. DM for Promotions; https://t.co/xgRZqBNnJQ

Mauriceocrypt @Mauriceocrypt

21K Followers 12K Following #Crypto_enthusiast 💰#investor 📈 #Global_influencer 🌍. #Contributor//@Gate @Potatoswap @Goblin @Yellow @ShareX. DM for Promotions; https://t.co/xgRZqBNnJQ

Welcome to Radio Free Meta, Bonk radio for the enlightened mind. Definitely not transmitting out of Langley, Virginia.

RFM Fella △ 🦩 �... @TanQboy

6K Followers 7K Following Welcome to Radio Free Meta, Bonk radio for the enlightened mind. Definitely not transmitting out of Langley, Virginia.

I am The Oaks Cellars Pte Ltd - Shareholder, and also a Crypto Enthusiast

susie @BarlevMeital

114 Followers 328 Following I am The Oaks Cellars Pte Ltd - Shareholder, and also a Crypto Enthusiast

The Bench Coach

Bokep @AndrewEHaskell

446 Followers 827 Following The Bench Coach

South Florida Comedy Shows

Dade County Comedy @DadeComedy

190 Followers 438 Following South Florida Comedy Shows

The world needs YOUR laughter, now more than ever. Record, Save & share your laughter on all IOS (iPhone) and Android devices. You'll love the Laugh of the Day.

laughsaver.com - Savi... @laughsaver

92 Followers 923 Following The world needs YOUR laughter, now more than ever. Record, Save & share your laughter on all IOS (iPhone) and Android devices. You'll love the Laugh of the Day.

Official Twitter page for Actress/Comedian

Marilyn Monrovia @Bunnyshines

1K Followers 3K Following Official Twitter page for Actress/Comedian

strictly here for laughs and gaffs

im a cube @elcubeo

87 Followers 179 Following strictly here for laughs and gaffs

Ifollow me in my adult smoothie empire

Lewis Hargreaves @LewisHa86923079

650 Followers 4K Following Ifollow me in my adult smoothie empire

todd norton @NortonTodd

82 Followers 1K Following

Like invest and love to sharing with all investors mining in #BTC, #ETH, #NFTs, #USDT, in cryptocurrencies market.
Just meet new friends for business .

Lisa @nurunnajwa03

149 Followers 226 Following Like invest and love to sharing with all investors mining in #BTC, #ETH, #NFTs, #USDT, in cryptocurrencies market. Just meet new friends for business .

https://t.co/al4O0qbzSP i am a comedian. Conan. Colbert. Letterman. I have a special on amazon. #CheerUp. Also a horror podcast on iTunes called Scary Monsters.

nick griffin @thenickgriffin

18K Followers 6K Following https://t.co/al4O0qbzSP i am a comedian. Conan. Colbert. Letterman. I have a special on amazon. #CheerUp. Also a horror podcast on iTunes called Scary Monsters.

Marketing Head, Comedian, Content Writer, A Good Listener too So Speak up About You.

ClinsKV @ClinsKV

107 Followers 360 Following Marketing Head, Comedian, Content Writer, A Good Listener too So Speak up About You.

I grew up in Massachusetts, specifically the Western part, which doesn't exist, though I do, within artistic spaces, checkin' out the non-alcoholic dranks.

Ezra @ezra_prior

253 Followers 965 Following I grew up in Massachusetts, specifically the Western part, which doesn't exist, though I do, within artistic spaces, checkin' out the non-alcoholic dranks.

Caffeine & dogs

Emily @Emily84373656

2 Followers 128 Following Caffeine & dogs

Patsy @patsy3435

172 Followers 1K Following

Audio Producer/Voice Talent/President On Cue Productions

B.Jay Kaplan @bjaykap

691 Followers 806 Following Audio Producer/Voice Talent/President On Cue Productions

Follower of Stand-Up Comedy+

Marvin F @1MarvelousMF

266 Followers 3K Following Follower of Stand-Up Comedy+

International megastar known as the Queen of all Entertainment, EGOT winner 🏆 (Emmy, Grammy, Oscar, Tony)
Stand-up comedian, actor, singer, producer🎭

Aida Libido @aida_libido

232 Followers 355 Following International megastar known as the Queen of all Entertainment, EGOT winner 🏆 (Emmy, Grammy, Oscar, Tony) Stand-up comedian, actor, singer, producer🎭

I will share with you the scariest videos and the most creepy trivia. Look up my YT channel
#HorrorCommunity #horror #scaryvideos #horrormovies #horrorstories

The Gravedigger @TheGravedigge14

2K Followers 4K Following I will share with you the scariest videos and the most creepy trivia. Look up my YT channel #HorrorCommunity #horror #scaryvideos #horrormovies #horrorstories

I can’t complain but I will

not emma b @notemmashandle

569 Followers 761 Following I can’t complain but I will

Radio engineer working in audio marketing that loves vintage advertising, the 80s, disco, classic alt, post punk, & electronic music.

Denny @denythewolves

815 Followers 5K Following Radio engineer working in audio marketing that loves vintage advertising, the 80s, disco, classic alt, post punk, & electronic music.

The more I drink, the more I spill.

Keller Reeves @kellerjreeves

370 Followers 1K Following The more I drink, the more I spill.

We run a zoom open mic every Wednesday 10:30PM EST We do a booked monthly youtube show sign up at https://t.co/2iuFq7irhm

GasStationMixtapesCom... @gas_comedy

64 Followers 201 Following We run a zoom open mic every Wednesday 10:30PM EST We do a booked monthly youtube show sign up at https://t.co/2iuFq7irhm

trespasses can be redeemed for travel passes

Mighty Flighty @AliciaMitchellz

204 Followers 1K Following trespasses can be redeemed for travel passes

Singer, Producer, Comedian, 300 Year-Old Swamp Witch who is lazy and likes to party. She/Her ✨

Niki Luparelli @nikiluparelli

3K Followers 3K Following Singer, Producer, Comedian, 300 Year-Old Swamp Witch who is lazy and likes to party. She/Her ✨

Improv At Its Best! Improv Shows & Classes, Around The World.

Andy Abramson @ImprovAtItsBest

569 Followers 4K Following Improv At Its Best! Improv Shows & Classes, Around The World.

Comedian, Podcast Host, Actor and Part-time Super Hero

Rich Greene @BigRichComedy

60 Followers 61 Following Comedian, Podcast Host, Actor and Part-time Super Hero

A podcast that profiles comics who are making their way in comedy from unlikely places. Hosted by Zach Peterson @mrzachpeterson

No Coast Comedy Club @NoCoastPod

453 Followers 1K Following A podcast that profiles comics who are making their way in comedy from unlikely places. Hosted by Zach Peterson @mrzachpeterson

i am very humble and friendly person I love football.. A Liverpool fan... YNWA❤❤....wad up 👍 @LFC

Mickydodo @Omowaye19

891 Followers 2K Following i am very humble and friendly person I love football.. A Liverpool fan... YNWA❤❤....wad up 👍 @LFC

Dealing with anxiety can be challenging but there are many effective ways to cope with it. Find the combination that works fo

Anxiety and stress Ma... @Serge229031581

202 Followers 851 Following Dealing with anxiety can be challenging but there are many effective ways to cope with it. Find the combination that works fo

Justin Beer @Justbeer1441

17 Followers 834 Following

I'm a simple joke person, telling jokes in NYC...

chaz @chazisme123

89 Followers 530 Following I'm a simple joke person, telling jokes in NYC...

Adama @Adama92165832

61 Followers 565 Following

Bristol’s Comedy Club, New York style comedy cellar downstairs from @sidneyandeden hosting the best U.K. & International acts

Bristol Comedy Den @BrisComedyDen

2K Followers 4K Following Bristol’s Comedy Club, New York style comedy cellar downstairs from @sidneyandeden hosting the best U.K. & International acts

Paras 08 @Paras0811

602 Followers 4K Following Nation First

🏠 Comic + filmmaker in LA. Ex-Google engineer.
📈 140k+ on TikTok
🟦 Antizionism debunker.

Geoff Plitt @GeoffreyPlitt

12K Followers 3K Following 🏠 Comic + filmmaker in LA. Ex-Google engineer. 📈 140k+ on TikTok 🟦 Antizionism debunker.

🥃 #newjersey #rawa #food #nyg

Spuds @TheeMcNulty

367 Followers 3K Following 🥃 #newjersey #rawa #food #nyg

Ron the Robot 🇸�... @robot_ron

705 Followers 7K Following “I think, therefore I am” — René Descartes. ~~~~ Just a regular human being behind an avatar. Trying to generate life, honesty, and humor. From the Bay to LA

Comedy Events in the North of England. Follow Us 🤝 We’ll Follow You

Comedy Bay @ComedyBayy

286 Followers 609 Following Comedy Events in the North of England. Follow Us 🤝 We’ll Follow You

F/US. Adult. Webcomic artist/writer. Minors DNI. I'm just livin' life and posting whatever the hell I want. I'm quirky like that.

Cressi @cressidiascomix

61 Followers 460 Following F/US. Adult. Webcomic artist/writer. Minors DNI. I'm just livin' life and posting whatever the hell I want. I'm quirky like that.

Sketch comedy. Not yet famous for unclear reasons. I promise not to DM.

Oh the Shame @OhtheShame1

665 Followers 1K Following Sketch comedy. Not yet famous for unclear reasons. I promise not to DM.

Not just another Jewish comedian. Because this one isn't funny. Proud Zionist/Israel Supporter. Contact me about anything comedy but not about Amway products.

Goldberg @Goldberg_Comic

935 Followers 613 Following Not just another Jewish comedian. Because this one isn't funny. Proud Zionist/Israel Supporter. Contact me about anything comedy but not about Amway products.

I’m fat so my pronouns are her/sheys. whatever it is..I’m joking

Matty Matt @spicywhitedude

95 Followers 514 Following I’m fat so my pronouns are her/sheys. whatever it is..I’m joking

There are a lot of IPA options. DM if you have an IPA idea. Parody.

Bad IPA @bad_ipa

859 Followers 3K Following There are a lot of IPA options. DM if you have an IPA idea. Parody.

Anitzionist Jewish Political Content Creator. Comic and Host of @paidprotest. 70 million views on Social Media. Content Creator for @trackaipac

OrangeMaxxing FreddyG @OrangeFreddyG

18K Followers 4K Following Anitzionist Jewish Political Content Creator. Comic and Host of @paidprotest. 70 million views on Social Media. Content Creator for @trackaipac

29 she/her. Publicly unhinged for eternity ♉️☀️♌️🌙♊️⬆️

Destiny Allegedly �... @DestinyHarHar

4K Followers 2K Following 29 she/her. Publicly unhinged for eternity ♉️☀️♌️🌙♊️⬆️

Arielle Dundas @ArielleDundas

13K Followers 3K Following My niche is that I’m funny and I have interesting opinions. She/her. Stardew valley streamer. ADHD. typos are part of my brand.

New York Comedienne. New hour special

mark normand @marknorm

562K Followers 416 Following New York Comedienne. New hour special "Out To Lunch" on the Youtubes now!! My pod: "Tuesdays with Stories” or “We Might be Drunk” Link 👇👇 Praise Allah!

she/her NY based comedian & little idiot
mgmt: tommy@frameworkent.com

limp brittzkit @Brittymigs

20K Followers 2K Following she/her NY based comedian & little idiot mgmt: [email protected]

Not funny, just weird. Specializing in childless dad jokes.

WJ Reid @WJReid3

3K Followers 2K Following Not funny, just weird. Specializing in childless dad jokes.

Comedian living on the East Coast/Aspiring Voice Actor /Grandson of Cedric Sneer

Corhar @Corhar4

2K Followers 2K Following Comedian living on the East Coast/Aspiring Voice Actor /Grandson of Cedric Sneer

Standup / Late Night Writer / Book “Dead People Suck” / Hulu special “Cis Woke Grief Sl*t

Laurie Kilmartin @anylaurie16

99K Followers 6K Following Standup / Late Night Writer / Book “Dead People Suck” / Hulu special “Cis Woke Grief Sl*t" (Hulu, Amazon, Apple TV) - On Tour

Christian Hedonist | Florida Supremacist | Southern Cosmopolitan | Side Splitters Regular | Classy Degenerate | Liberal Elitist | Blue Collar Scholar

The Big Crunch Theory @CrunchCardwell

2K Followers 2K Following Christian Hedonist | Florida Supremacist | Southern Cosmopolitan | Side Splitters Regular | Classy Degenerate | Liberal Elitist | Blue Collar Scholar

NYC standup. Winner of the 2021 Coney Island Comedy Festival. Check out Roast Battle League NY. he/him

Dan Wickes @dan_wickes

11K Followers 2K Following NYC standup. Winner of the 2021 Coney Island Comedy Festival. Check out Roast Battle League NY. he/him

tv/film writer & psychotherapist-turned-comedian 🌈🎤@podshamespiral @gayshamecomedy

ely kreimendahl @ElyKreimendahl

128K Followers 2K Following tv/film writer & psychotherapist-turned-comedian 🌈🎤@podshamespiral @gayshamecomedy

nevertheless she locked in | standup | sketches | relatable traumatized girl📍NYC | host of Sad Girl Survival Guide | see me live 🎟️ in bio

glennis ❤️‍🔥 @theglennisshow

10K Followers 885 Following nevertheless she locked in | standup | sketches | relatable traumatized girl📍NYC | host of Sad Girl Survival Guide | see me live 🎟️ in bio

charles entertainment... @jmurffff

18K Followers 1K Following chaotic rat

professional cutie + my comedy special Don’t Sleep With Comedians is on YouTube 💖 🪩✨

big honkin caboose @itsbighonkin

100K Followers 971 Following professional cutie + my comedy special Don’t Sleep With Comedians is on YouTube 💖 🪩✨

| Actor | V.A. | Comedian | Featured: NYTimes | Seeso | NBC | ComedyClubs: NYCC | SUNY | GWCC | BWCC | QED | C&C | Gotham | GrislyPear

Slaughter house guy @DanielJPerafan

6K Followers 2K Following | Actor | V.A. | Comedian | Featured: NYTimes | Seeso | NBC | ComedyClubs: NYCC | SUNY | GWCC | BWCC | QED | C&C | Gotham | GrislyPear

“you miss 100% of the shots you take” -my high school basketball coach

gianmarco @GianmarcoSoresi

215K Followers 7K Following “you miss 100% of the shots you take” -my high school basketball coach

Stand Up Comic / Writer / Host of @explainingshow

Jonathan Tillson @JonathanTillson

5K Followers 5K Following Stand Up Comic / Writer / Host of @explainingshow

certified california junior ranger (she/her). stupid sense of humor but interesting takes. Frodo Baggins stan account. IG @itssarahdutcher

Sarah @sarahoftherings

5K Followers 1K Following certified california junior ranger (she/her). stupid sense of humor but interesting takes. Frodo Baggins stan account. IG @itssarahdutcher

A loser in nyc. Follow me on Twitter.

Matt Somerstein @MPSomerstein

8K Followers 4K Following A loser in nyc. Follow me on Twitter.

hey! | headline contributor @theonion @reductress @bwaybeatnews | he/him

kevin @Ke7inBurke

4K Followers 1K Following hey! | headline contributor @theonion @reductress @bwaybeatnews | he/him

I’m glad nobody can see this

respected professiona... @lossfollower

1K Followers 729 Following I’m glad nobody can see this

Hey! It's me that guy!!

Greg Sego @TheGregSego

514 Followers 2K Following Hey! It's me that guy!!

the pulchritudinous balatron

Sweetums McGoo @tangentleman

87 Followers 225 Following the pulchritudinous balatron

Don’t fit in? Call the Law Orifices of Lou Briccant. CLICK HERE 👇👇🏿👇🏻TO SEE MY 👉👌

Laughing Lemur @LaughingLemur69

617 Followers 930 Following Don’t fit in? Call the Law Orifices of Lou Briccant. CLICK HERE 👇👇🏿👇🏻TO SEE MY 👉👌

Lead Producer - Subnautica 2 @unknownworlds - previous Senior Producer - Relic Entertainment & Development Director - BioWare - plus a lot of other crap.

Tigist @TigistSapphire

5K Followers 2K Following Lead Producer - Subnautica 2 @unknownworlds - previous Senior Producer - Relic Entertainment & Development Director - BioWare - plus a lot of other crap.

animals with unconventional names / created by @420insidejob & co-managed by @nicolejusttweet / DM submissions. / Business Inquiries: petfindernames@gmail.com

petfinder names @petfindernames

328K Followers 10 Following animals with unconventional names / created by @420insidejob & co-managed by @nicolejusttweet / DM submissions. / Business Inquiries: [email protected]

Professional Entertainer (Juggling/Comedy/Magic/Circus Skills Tutor) 8-time @UKPunOff winner. New #LunchPun joke each day. https://t.co/8h8dDcuhfs

Stevie Vegas (Steve t... @SteveJuggler

8K Followers 4K Following Professional Entertainer (Juggling/Comedy/Magic/Circus Skills Tutor) 8-time @UKPunOff winner. New #LunchPun joke each day. https://t.co/8h8dDcuhfs

a stand-up guy

verified on tinder

Pat @pat__man

338 Followers 293 Following a stand-up guy verified on tinder

Hobbying pun writer. Currently in Kyoto for the Anagram World Championship. Turns out it's in Tokyo.

Gareth George - Groan... @groanman2020

7K Followers 6K Following Hobbying pun writer. Currently in Kyoto for the Anagram World Championship. Turns out it's in Tokyo.

Am simple and friendly but if you ask for gift card I will block you

Hannah @Hannah44768380

12 Followers 107 Following Am simple and friendly but if you ask for gift card I will block you

Experience is the name everyone gives to their mistakes.
— Oscar Wilde
https://t.co/YZ8CbWdvOa
https://t.co/RL3MYfNgNW

MMZZO @MMZZ0

9K Followers 7K Following Experience is the name everyone gives to their mistakes. — Oscar Wilde https://t.co/YZ8CbWdvOa https://t.co/RL3MYfNgNW

Ima sometimes dude sometimes I’m a Actor 🥸sometimes a Comedian🤣 hell sometimes I’m a Photographer 📸. I don’t choose I go with the flow 😀🤷🏾‍♂️

AYEYOKEVO @yungkev06

180 Followers 693 Following Ima sometimes dude sometimes I’m a Actor 🥸sometimes a Comedian🤣 hell sometimes I’m a Photographer 📸. I don’t choose I go with the flow 😀🤷🏾‍♂️

Comedy enthusiast embarking on a stand-up career. Because you can never truly be a student of something without some failures.

ComedyFrog #BLM @CoryFrogPrints

255 Followers 513 Following Comedy enthusiast embarking on a stand-up career. Because you can never truly be a student of something without some failures.

notary private, antifa reservist, and the #1 beta male (he/his)
Links for my campaign for Minnesota Governor: https://t.co/XfcNsQJCZz

steven young: running... @steventhebold

958 Followers 2K Following notary private, antifa reservist, and the #1 beta male (he/his) Links for my campaign for Minnesota Governor: https://t.co/XfcNsQJCZz

Tweets and blockbusters.

Scottie Pippstein @SPippstein

1K Followers 1K Following Tweets and blockbusters.

I simply am not there

R.J. @TroubledBoyRJ

2K Followers 415 Following I simply am not there

Assyrian-American. Brown enough for racists, not brown enough for Hollywood. Comedian in LA.

Matthew Evanoff @iate2muchhummus

291 Followers 401 Following Assyrian-American. Brown enough for racists, not brown enough for Hollywood. Comedian in LA.

I’m a comedian mainly but also I’m an actress, model, poet, writer, romance novelist and freelance artist 👩‍🎨

Kristina @kristis_korner

682 Followers 2K Following I’m a comedian mainly but also I’m an actress, model, poet, writer, romance novelist and freelance artist 👩‍🎨

Part Comic, part magician, part bartender..combined, just plain funny. Has toured the US from comedy clubs/ colleges. Hates creamed corn. Sober.

Charlie Martin @Charles94573404

337 Followers 2K Following Part Comic, part magician, part bartender..combined, just plain funny. Has toured the US from comedy clubs/ colleges. Hates creamed corn. Sober.

I'm that nerd your mom warned you about. pronouns: he/him

Randy Basinger, nerd ... @baseman69

447 Followers 4K Following I'm that nerd your mom warned you about. pronouns: he/him

Here for the funnies

Mostly Retweets @GodSaveTheLean

363 Followers 2K Following Here for the funnies

R https://t.co/xrjEEfBLwe Remember to reinstall your phase converter to 31° left of center.

Philosopher King, Ora... @signalborder

5K Followers 5K Following R https://t.co/xrjEEfBLwe Remember to reinstall your phase converter to 31° left of center.

ACREE⚡️DC @AcreeSpencer

212 Followers 448 Following Alpha Mail

Ingrowing toenail, hairy back, is this trapped wind or a heart attack?
Real name Kevin. Greater Manchester's 37th best rapper (over the age of 40).

Quiche Moon @quiche_moon

890 Followers 878 Following Ingrowing toenail, hairy back, is this trapped wind or a heart attack? Real name Kevin. Greater Manchester's 37th best rapper (over the age of 40).

flaviusvalens @flaviusvalens1

8K Followers 9K Following Some guy

v @vnessified

2K Followers 13 Following

I've put very little effort into this page and it shows. I'm only on X because they confiscated my library card.

H.B. Hamm @hammgravy

4K Followers 4K Following I've put very little effort into this page and it shows. I'm only on X because they confiscated my library card.

Writing and animating with @shawnmcduffee | Cinnamon roll fan account | Voice Actor |

Jason Rugg @JaseRuggy

4K Followers 5K Following Writing and animating with @shawnmcduffee | Cinnamon roll fan account | Voice Actor | "Just some dude it was"

#DeceptiComics
Stand Up Comedian
#BadAdviceShow Podcast

YouTube: CerromeRussellComic

MonsterKing @CerromeRussell

34K Followers 3K Following #DeceptiComics Stand Up Comedian #BadAdviceShow Podcast YouTube: CerromeRussellComic

Now I am become Dave, the destroyer of words.

*Inventor of the flinglong*

I only sleep to give my phone a break

Daveastated @Daveastated

7K Followers 1K Following Now I am become Dave, the destroyer of words. *Inventor of the flinglong* I only sleep to give my phone a break

^not completely without merit^

- audi, vide, tace -

whispering into the Xhitter through clenched teeth

MarcusVulpes 🦊 @fearnot

3K Followers 4K Following ^not completely without merit^ - audi, vide, tace - whispering into the Xhitter through clenched teeth

surrounded by a chaos of my own making | tweets in link below

meghan @deloisivete

23K Followers 3K Following surrounded by a chaos of my own making | tweets in link below

Inventor of Elehugs. Fanatic of Taco Bell. Crazzzy with Three z’s. I love you too.

kendy cane @kenisgone

9K Followers 8K Following Inventor of Elehugs. Fanatic of Taco Bell. Crazzzy with Three z’s. I love you too.

This is a parody account of a parody account. 3 time failed comedian. I’m accidentally retweeted by @anncoulter on rare occasions.

Subtle Genius🔺🏅 @2018Winning

884 Followers 554 Following This is a parody account of a parody account. 3 time failed comedian. I’m accidentally retweeted by @anncoulter on rare occasions.

The more I drink, the more I spill.

Keller Reeves @kellerjreeves

370 Followers 1K Following The more I drink, the more I spill.

We make sketches and do a live show in NYC
Check us out on YT and IG
Follow us or I swear to god we'll start a podcast

Half-Pint @HalfPintComedy

161 Followers 63 Following We make sketches and do a live show in NYC Check us out on YT and IG Follow us or I swear to god we'll start a podcast

Stand-up Comic, actor and son of a Neurosurgeon, as seen on America's Got Talent, Tonight Show, Howard Stern show and Comedy Central.

Tom Cotter @TomCotterComic

37K Followers 797 Following Stand-up Comic, actor and son of a Neurosurgeon, as seen on America's Got Talent, Tonight Show, Howard Stern show and Comedy Central.

30+ years as a comic, 13 years as a husband, 10 years as a father of three. My Hollywood pronouns are Who is he/Never heard of him. Scott Baio is aware of me

Auggie Smith @AuggieSmith

10K Followers 2K Following 30+ years as a comic, 13 years as a husband, 10 years as a father of three. My Hollywood pronouns are Who is he/Never heard of him. Scott Baio is aware of me

stand up | Tour Dates | Beautiful Boys podcast | new special “Traumatized Animal” | all links 👇🏼

Mike Cannon @IamMikeCannon

15K Followers 1K Following stand up | Tour Dates | Beautiful Boys podcast | new special “Traumatized Animal” | all links 👇🏼

vibe coder (non-derogatory)
former head of creative @wwwsublimeapp
current writer of Both Are True, a top 10 humor newsletter https://t.co/z02tACRblv

Alex Dobrenko @Dobrenkz

11K Followers 1K Following vibe coder (non-derogatory) former head of creative @wwwsublimeapp current writer of Both Are True, a top 10 humor newsletter https://t.co/z02tACRblv

Red Nose Day is back, Friday 21st March!

Comic Relief @comicrelief

210K Followers 1K Following Red Nose Day is back, Friday 21st March!

The Michael Jordan of Comedy (when he played baseball) Stream my album No Punchline Required. Host of I Love Rock & Roll podcast @RockAndRollPod

Ken Krantz @KenKrantzComic

1K Followers 750 Following The Michael Jordan of Comedy (when he played baseball) Stream my album No Punchline Required. Host of I Love Rock & Roll podcast @RockAndRollPod

CEO/Talent Manager at Golden Artists Ent. Casting Married @rebekahkochan https://t.co/8UVe1Mx0Eu PRESS 818-635-7910 Collabs & shoutouts: DM me

Dante @Dantethecomic

28K Followers 29K Following CEO/Talent Manager at Golden Artists Ent. Casting Married @rebekahkochan https://t.co/8UVe1Mx0Eu PRESS 818-635-7910 Collabs & shoutouts: DM me

Ridiculous & disgusting things go on here....like sarcastic things. (gasp). I also share music. I probably don’t like you. Fuck off.

The Wife @TheWifeYouLove

29K Followers 8K Following Ridiculous & disgusting things go on here....like sarcastic things. (gasp). I also share music. I probably don’t like you. Fuck off.

You'll never find more people smoking than outside of a hospital 🇨🇦
https://t.co/NcqURETrPU

Stefan Urquelle @OfficeofSteve

24K Followers 9K Following You'll never find more people smoking than outside of a hospital 🇨🇦 https://t.co/NcqURETrPU

Comedy in Chicago

Probably Fine @FineProbably

25 Followers 319 Following Comedy in Chicago

Make me laugh and I’ll love you forever 👀

Kellalena @topaz_kell

102K Followers 8K Following Make me laugh and I’ll love you forever 👀

ur cousin tony | @meatcats @wahomic @overheard

riri🐀🍕 @raunchonpizza

6K Followers 642 Following ur cousin tony | @meatcats @wahomic @overheard

Conversational in sarcasm. Bill Nye, I’m coming for your ass! He/Him BLM

❤️Hush Jared🤙 @HushJared

9K Followers 2K Following Conversational in sarcasm. Bill Nye, I’m coming for your ass! He/Him BLM

Trends for United States

Muley

#DMDSportsDay2026

Introducing

Project Gutenberg

Frawley

Giulia

Garvin

#MLBS6Spoilers

Telescope

Bud Deal

Flint Moore

#ตี๋ตี๋ป๋อสปอร์ตเดย์2026

MySpace

TEETEEPOR CHEER UP

DOMUNDI SPORTS 2026

#thewaltenfiles

#SmackDown

Bo Jackson

Cole Irvin

DevOps

You might like

@TheIgorMartinez

Greyson Clemens

@gclemenscomics

@RalphTheMouth81

Justen Williams