TheRealPatsyStone @patsy_real
Joined June 2023-
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"What is the name of the town you got the hell out of when you graduated from high school?" mcsweeneys.net/articles/secur…
Someone tell the cunt who's been in charge for the last 13 years
"It's time for a change, and we are it" PM Rishi Sunak finishes his speech by promising to "give the country what it so sorely needs… so that we can build a brighter future for everyone" Follow live bbc.in/3rLuHjj
It's never lupus
me to my friends during the opening credits of the medical drama House
You're offered $100k to recite 90% of a movie. What movie are you choosing? 🎥
The biggest room in the world is room for improvement.
Babe, what’s wrong? You’ve barely chugged your Eggo Brunch in a Jar Appalachian Sippin’ Cream
We all saw Wild Things
GAWD I still love her (MY President) and yes, Biden is old, but that just means President Harris and if you have a problem with either of those statements, well then, you need to take a look at yourself
“She’s the first woman. She’s the first woman of color. She’s the first daughter of immigrants. So there will definitely be a lot more scrutiny… I think she’s done a much better job than she gets credit for.” @HillaryClinton on a Biden-Harris ticket.
Well played
Her job is hand
Boebert: I went on a date night in I am a congresswoman and a public figure but believe it or not, I am human too. As a mother of four boys and a grandmother to a beautiful grandson, that's my first job before anything else and my priority.
I couldn’t attend the funeral but I did send several Monkees impersonators, all of whom were professionals. It was important to pay Mickey Dolenzes.
Considering the Conservative plan is to destroy the planet while bankrupting the British people
Britain's interior minister Suella Braverman said the country needed to take a pragmatic approach to reaching net zero because it could not ‘save the planet by bankrupting the British people’ reut.rs/454cOtI
I’m fine with Biden’s age because I’m fine with a President Harris. washingtonpost.com/opinions/2023/…
"The bed frame could be sturdier. The kitchen counter could be sturdier. The patio furniture could be sturdier. The bathroom sink could be sturdier. The refrigerator is surprisingly sturdy—no complaints there!" mcsweeneys.net/articles/a-rev…
Who's gonna tell him?
Britain's interior minister Suella Braverman said the country needed to take a pragmatic approach to reaching net zero because it could not ‘save the planet by bankrupting the British people’ reut.rs/454cOtI
Sam Taggart @samttaggart
12K Followers 757 Following One of the first good girls to go bad. Co-host of @straightiolab. Listen here: https://t.co/Gsg4hj9RcQ
Julian Edelman @Edelman11
1.4M Followers 950 Following The OFFICIAL Twitter of Julian Edelman. @GamesWithNames & @DudesOnDudesPod
Josh Gondelman @joshgondelman
177K Followers 3K Following Year round iced coffee drinker. Stand-up special "People Pleaser" out now. Previously: Last Week Tonight, Mrs. Maisel, Head Writer/EP Desus & Mero.
Chase Mitchell @ChaseMit
82K Followers 3K Following I write for TV and pick up my dog’s shit with a little bag.
John Moe @johnmoe
35K Followers 885 Following Host of DEPRESH MODE and SLEEPING WITH CELEBRITIES. Author-The Hilarious World of Depression, other books. Speech maker, lead singer. https://t.co/LqK6EjcsGa
Gabe Delahaye @gabedelahaye
13K Followers 667 Following I am a writer and comedian just like everybody else.
Mike Duncan @mikeduncan
119K Followers 108 Following History podcaster/author. Revolutions + The History of Rome.
Patrick Wyman @Patrick_Wyman
54K Followers 1K Following Pods: Past Lives. Tides of History. Book: "The Verge," on the world around 1500. Coming soon: "Lost Worlds," on prehistory. (5/6/26). pwymanusc at gmail.
Ken Jennings @KenJennings
413K Followers 496 Following Your Jeopardy! pal. Author of 100 PLACES TO SEE AFTER YOU DIE (https://t.co/pxwTQ2d7lo) and a bunch of other stuff. OMNIBUS co-founder (https://t.co/aURWrO4dAO).
The Mountain Goats @mountain_goats
174K Followers 4K Following reapplying to the University of New Hampshire's PhD program in Rhetoric, Literacy, and Composition Studies
Punch Line Sacramento @PunchLineSac
9K Followers 2K Following Bringing Sacramento the biggest names in comedy for nearly 30 years! IG @punchlinesac | FB @PLSAC 2100 Arden Way Suite 95825
Michael Caine @themichaelcaine
791K Followers 82 Following
Patton Oswalt @pattonoswalt
3.9M Followers 4K Following Head over to https://t.co/RxSAvjPK2W for tour dates, comics & whatever else I’m working on. I like making stuff. IG, Threads & BlueSky: @pattonoswalt
chris evans @notcapnamerica
293K Followers 4K Following ✊🏽🏳️🌈 Small business owner. Receipts provider 🧾 Movie live-tweeter. Sign up for my FREE monthly newsletter! business inquiries: [email protected]
Jane Coaston 🏔️ @janecoaston
132K Followers 670 Following Host of @crookedmedia’s What A Day. @nytimes. @CNN. Go Blue means Go the University of Michigan. Also at @janecoaston.bsky.social.
Astead @AsteadWH
198K Followers 3K Following Host, America, Actually! @voxmedia Editorial director @voxdotcom Political analyst @cnn Former @nytimes @bostonglobe
Tiffany Stevenson @tiffstevenson
47K Followers 3K Following Your girlfriend’s fave comedian/actor/step mum @kuruptfm GameFace @hellobuglers @mocktheweek @lolnetwork Avenue 5 @hbo Work @pbjmanagement @3artsent
Chris Skinner @producerchris
10K Followers 896 Following Producer: The Bugle / VP: Sony Music / Eejit: Travel Hacker #TeamBugle
Brian Cox @ProfBrianCox
2.9M Followers 1K Following Professor of Particle Physics at The University of Manchester
Andy Zaltzman @ZaltzCricket
135K Followers 21 Following Comedian, host of The Bugle Podcast and The News Quiz, Test Match Special cricket statistician. On tour in Australia Dec 2025-Jan 2026, UK from February.
Alice R Fraser @aliterative
21K Followers 952 Following Join my weekly writers meetings at Patreon: https://t.co/tW11m5Pjri 🎙️ Podcasts: The Gargle; The Bugle; The Last Post; Tea With Alice; Alice Fraser Trilogy.
The Bugle @hellobuglers
57K Followers 25 Following The independent weekly satirical comedy podcast, by Andy Zaltzman, with a new team of co-hosts. Power-hosing hogwash over Planet Earth since 2007.
John Oliver @iamjohnoliver
4.9M Followers 142 Following Comedian. @LastWeekTonight, @TheDailyShow, The Bugle Podcast (@hellobuglers)
Chris Fleming @chrisfluming
158K Followers 654 Following
WeRateDogs @dog_rates
9.1M Followers 13 Following Your Only Source For Professional Dog Ratings Instagram and Facebook ➜ WeRateDogs [email protected] | nonprofit: @15outof10 ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
Sean Tejaratchi @ShittingtonUK
28K Followers 386 Following Every moment you spend hating is like a precious jewel you steal from yourself.
Adam Ellis @adamtotscomix
1.1M Followers 419 Following https://t.co/LG3KC8RHak • https://t.co/aCjpFLsw8F • Let Me In Your Window: https://t.co/HCIk9rB8Qd • Apparel Store: https://t.co/QLiV19eS8G
Anuvab Pal @AnuvabPal
17K Followers 197 Following Indian comedian/scriptwriter, often in the UK Contact: [email protected]
Josh Barro @jbarro
276K Followers 2K Following I write (at https://t.co/ZoyMCO4ICD) & I co-host CENTRAL AIR, a major weekly politics podcast. https://t.co/27H6dlohwT Email josh at joshbarro dot com
Whores of Yore @WhoresofYore
580K Followers 7K Following Sex History. "A Catalogue of Jilts, Cracks, Nightwalkers, Whores, She-Friends, Kind Women & Others of the Linen-Lifting Tribe”
Chef José Andrés �... @chefjoseandres
1.1M Followers 2K Following We all are Citizens of the World. What's good for you, must be good for all. If you are lost, share a plate of food with a stranger...you will find who you are.
roger bennett @rogbennett
191K Followers 2K Following A million podcasts on @MenInBlazers (Tweets sent may be used on Men In Blazers worldwide) & HBO's #BandOfBrothers Pod. Appearances: [email protected]
Men in Blazers @MenInBlazers
356K Followers 3K Following Independent Global Football Coverage 🌎 Football, Passion, Empathy, Courage 💙 🎧 Podcasts 📺 TV Show 💻 YouTube 📰 Newsletters
Nish Kumar @MrNishKumar
389K Followers 1K Following Comedian & great friend. Albums: https://t.co/3mphPZ5HDp (He/him) Pic by @JazzShaniceArt co-host of @podsavetheuk
Maria Bamford @mariabamfoo
188K Followers 700 Following Handcrafted Stand-Up Comedy Since the 1900’s ✈️ I'M ON TOUR!
Kyle Griffin @kylegriffin1
1.3M Followers 667 Following Executive Producer @weeknightmsnow. Opinions mine. Do not congratulate. THREADS @griffinkyle BLUESKY @kylegriffin1
Margaret Cho @margaretcho
392K Followers 77K Following stream “Lucky Gift” the single from my new album out Valentine’s Day 2025 On tour now! get tkts below ❤️
Chris Fairbanks @chrisfairbanks
24K Followers 1K Following “Rescue Cactus” on Amazon. Podcast: Do You Need a Ride? @dynarpodcast The Rescue Cactus Album, is streaming exclusively on Pandoramusic right now!
McSweeney's @mcsweeneys
231K Followers 986 Following The official feed of McSweeney's Quarterly Concern, McSweeney's Internet Tendency, & McSweeney's Books. Publisher of @illustoria and @believermag.
Linduh Evangelista @marcuslmorris
1K Followers 632 Following Black Queer Liberation ✊🏾✊🏾✊🏾 #blackqueerappalachia #eleganceisrefusal
Louis Virtel @louisvirtel
148K Followers 1K Following Keep It! podcast on Crooked Media Jimmy Kimmel Live!
Big Supernaturals @UweBollocks
34K Followers 2K Following I teach kids, farm hot peppers and I have perfect politics. Mid-90s Memphis rap historian. Horror lover. Host of the @soundtracker_ podcast 🇵🇸
Uncle Dynamite @UncleDynamite
20K Followers 812 Following Candidate for sainthood. “The opinion of 10,000 people is of no value if none of them know anything about the subject.” -Marcus Aurelius
David Weigel @daveweigel
524K Followers 14K Following Covering politics for @semafor. Alum: @washingtonpost, @business, @slate. [email protected]. Buy my book: https://t.co/6sWfZ4MNgH
b-boy bouiebaisse @jbouie
385K Followers 1K Following My name is Jamelle Bouie. @nytopinion columnist. Co-host of @UnclearPod. Upgrade your grey matter, ‘cuz one day it may matter.Trends for United States
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