Samir Lakhani @samirl

Human. Father. Product @ Amazon, ex Meta, Microsoft, Upwork. magicall.app Seattle, WA Joined April 2007

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Following

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Samir Lakhani @samirl

a month ago

When you’ve got a partner and close friends who lift you up and inspire you and enough money to not be on the street for several years, you’ve made it. Anything else is icing on the cake so don’t overthink it- do it all, enjoy the ride!

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Samir Lakhani @samirl

5 years ago

@dvassallo Yes! Also how they’re down to play almost any game at any time.. At least so far…

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Samir Lakhani @samirl

5 years ago

@dvassallo Let’s continue this conversation when our consciousnesses are in the cloud, it’s be more efficient.. :)

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Samir Lakhani @samirl

5 years ago

11/ Recognize & accept that this challenge is a part of life. Extreme athletes feel most alive when they're at risk of losing it all. This diagnosis made us appreciate our health and the things that are truly important like laughter, friends & tender moment with family. 💖

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Samir Lakhani @samirl

5 years ago

10/ Negative visualization. Stoics build gratitude and resilience by identifying all the things that can go wrong and *feel* what it will be like (youtube videos of post-mastectomy, types of complications, recovery strategies). If shit gets off the rails, you've been there..

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Samir Lakhani @samirl

5 years ago

9/ Mentally prepare your kids before the big day. i.e. Can't hug mom for a few weeks, she'll be weak.. but she'll be ok. Give them jobs to do afterwards and have lots of fun leading up to surgery!

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Samir Lakhani @samirl

5 years ago

8/ Control the flow of negativity. Most people are positive and supportive, but some people can be negative and channel their own anxieties. Amy would only let positive feelings in rejecting/ignoring the rest.

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Samir Lakhani @samirl

5 years ago

7/ Write down a plan (preparation, surgery, recovery). This is an old Amazon trait, where no important initiatives happen without a document. Helped me to think through all the pieces if only so I could feel like we had things under control

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Samir Lakhani @samirl

5 years ago

5/ Connect her to things she loves, before the surgery. I organized karaoke night 💃 with friends, encouraged swim across the lake, friend time. Could spend all your time preparing for the big day without doing the things that make it all worth it. Live like there's no tomorrow.

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Samir Lakhani @samirl

5 years ago

6/ Provide comic relief 🤡 Pretty quickly after the diagnosis we were joking about 'nipple death' and what size+shape celebrity breasts she wanted.. ymmv

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Samir Lakhani @samirl

5 years ago

4/ Be her eyes and ears. Go to all the doctors appointments, take notes, ask questions, given input (when asked). This diagnosis can overwhelm the most level headed person so she needs you to backstop.

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Samir Lakhani @samirl

5 years ago

3/ Move closer to family. We temporarily moved into her parents place in Minneapolis and our village has been incredibly helpful supportive to us and the kids

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Samir Lakhani @samirl

5 years ago

2/ Be around mentally as well as physically. I completely stopped working on my high stress startup to focus on her: helped navigate treatment options, provided emotional support and handled kids. My investors were very supportive.

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Samir Lakhani @samirl

5 years ago

1/ Write how your feel. For days after diagnosis my head was ringing: Why does a good person who eats organic and exercises get cancer? How could we have prevented this? Will my kids grow up without a mom? I started writing it down, which helped me process and clear my head

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Samir Lakhani @samirl

5 years ago

My wife @amylakhani was diagnosed with early stage breast cancer in July. She had a double mastectomy and is on the road to recovery. Here's what I've learned so far about supporting a partner with a #cancer diagnosis 👇

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Samir Lakhani @samirl

5 years ago

@Austen I’m in!

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Samir Lakhani @samirl

5 years ago

@hnshah LastPass.. actually tried paying for it this week.. 404s...

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Samir Lakhani @samirl

6 years ago

@justinkan Sales and customer service were relationship jobs but pieces get automated away each year... won’t that continue as ppl become ok interacting digitally (and sometimes prefer it)