The Zeroth Tim @Timacious_D
You're probably here because I said something funny, stupid, or both. Either way, there's plenty more where that came from.| Nashville, TN Joined May 2008-
Tweets17K
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Followers2K
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Following655
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Likes115K
@naeriface Lemme pack a fork real quick
@naeriface Do you offer drone delivery?
The Zeroth Tim retweeted
Well that sucks. Adding a predator was going to make it entertaining.
The Zeroth Tim retweeted
“Mr. Piker, the guards inform me that you’re 32 years old, yet you dress like a teenager. Why is that?” “It’s…it’s how I express myself. Holy fucking shit, dude!” “You were a tubby boy, weren’t you? Flabby youth. Thought you could relive it; this time better, thinner.” “…”
Pats trading up to draft a guy from Utah so Vrabel has someone to talk to about multiple wives
Microplastics are the spice of life
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NASA ran a study on a potential trip to Mars and found the most important trait for team dynamics was humor
@crotchner2 Vomit charging is the innovation that new phones lack
Some problems are universal.
#NEWS 🚨: Artemis II crew experienced issues with Outlook this morning and had to ask ground crew for assistance "We have two Microsoft Outlooks and neither one is working"
@naeriface The 80s music video which must not be named
They're hitting the vapes!
Squirrels are 'vaping' e-cigarettes after mistaking fruity aromas for food trib.al/IvZIB0D
Even the aliens are fleeing from the commie mayor
Eerie trio of UFOs spotted 'chasing each other' over New York City: video trib.al/GTZDGeZ
Call him Daniel Ocean after a robbery like this
The #Colts are locking in their QB, finalizing a deal with Daniel Jones to secure the most important position, per me and @TomPelissero. It’s a 2-year, $100M contract done by his agents at @AthletesFirst. The biggest two-year deal in NFL history.
The tunnel elves of hidden knowledge
Hobby tunneling unlocks the hidden genius within
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