Jeevan @jeevanjayap
I love exploring how to live well and to the fullest. I ghostwrite educational email courses for the health and performance coaches. substack.com/@jeevanjayapra… London, United Kingdom Joined July 2017-
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There’s a deep satisfaction that comes with being internally consistent. This means being a person that doesn’t break promises made to themselves, follows through on their commitments to others and who always acts in accordance with their strongly held convictions and values. Everyone knows what you’ll do before you’ve done it. Even you don’t really need to think anymore. Predictable but that’s the point. You’re a beacon of stability and comfort to others in a world that can sometimes be anything but. You sparkle in an unusual, understated way. No one grants you this nor can anyone take it away from you. It’s just who you choose to be. Always.
One of the most annoying human afflictions: The time and energy we waste thinking about doing something and not being aware that we are lost in this black hole and incurring a great mental cost for the pleasure of being there. Sometimes the path of least resistance (and pain) is catching yourself and just doing the damn thing.
This is either liberating or terrifying: There is probably no answer. But everything is downstream of the question you ask.
In any given moment, your experience of life is the dialogue happening in your head about what has happened, what is happening or what will happen. The hard part is influencing and ultimately choosing the dialogue (or lack of) that you want running in your head all the time.
“I can’t wait!” The present often feels like an inconvenience that stands between us and something exciting in the future. But there is joy to be had in the anticipation. We forget it’s part of the experience of the thing. We’re blinded by impatience! Learning to notice and bask in the feeling of anticipation is a subtle but meaningful quality of life improvement.
I’ve realised that what you eat and drink affects what you think and ultimately, the ideas you produce. We need our food and drink to give us steady, enduring energy to do our best work. For me, avoiding that pastry has become less about the calories and more about the ideas it will cost me in an hour or two when my blood sugar crashes and the lethargy has consumed me. Sometimes it’s not worth paying the ideas tax!
People that I admire have found something to be deeply interested in and have lost themselves in the pursuit of mastery. They have an insatiable desire to produce their most incredible work because they believe the world would be poorer without their contribution. That’s a life that feels truly rich.
They never just cut to the end of the film. The 5% at the end only has meaning because of the 95% that came before it. And if they did, we’d all be up in arms because we’d feel deprived of the chance to lose ourselves in the magic of the story. To feel everything there is to feel. This is just a quick reminder you’re in that 95% right now The magic is unfolding now whether you realise it or not =)
There awaits a good day in the future where you’ll admire yourself for having chipped away on the meh or downright bad days.
It’s hard to be distracted by anxieties and worries when you treat the thing in front of you as the only thing that matters and that needs doing well. I like to think of it as the craftsperson’s attitude to anything and everything in your life.
Here's one way to make your life richer and more interesting: Don't shutdown the weird or esoteric. When the words "people like me shouldn't entertain this" runs through your mind, let it. And then ignore it. Who do you think has collected more interesting experiences, stories or insights: Person A who rejects everything that doesn't align with their worldview or Person B who leaves the door open for their worldview to expand?
When the lights go out and the curtain draws, the regret is rarely that you lived for others. It's that you only lived for yourself.
One thing that people don’t do enough: Recall all the great things they’ve accomplished and the difficulties they’ve overcome in the past. This is one of the best things you can do when it feels like the world has gone dark and you’re in your head. It makes you sit up a little taller and feel a subtle burst of energy in your body. You feel different to how you felt 5 minutes ago. It’s usually just enough to help you take the next step in whatever you’re doing.
Managing the tension between pushing yourself without creating unnecessary suffering is hard. One one hand, you know that what you are pursuing cannot be achieved with moderate effort. Doing something special requires going to depths that most people aren’t willing to go. It requires a maniacal dedication and sacrifice. It can’t be anything other than hard. On the other hand, holding yourself to the dizzying standards that are necessary often leads to vicious self-talk and beating yourself up. The journey then becomes a nightmare and if you think about it, the journey is all you really have. Build yourself up like a fan rather than talking trash to yourself like a rival if for nothing else than to make the journey more enjoyable.
Choosing to be a principled person with clear values is quite liberating. By clear values, I mean values you have deliberately selected and that you can say within seconds of being asked by someone. I mean the type of response that makes it clear to the other person that you’ve actually thought about this deeply way before they asked. Because when you have clear values, decisions are easy. There is no rumination, second guessing or unease. You just act. The choice is obvious. Imagine a life like that.
“What do you do in your free time?” People tend to ask you this question if they feel something is ‘off’ about you. You are giving off slightly unusual vibes and they want you to confirm their hunch. Hearing this question used to make me squirm because I knew my answer would draw quizzical looks and questions dressed up as curiosity (but that are actually designed to make you feel out of place). But look closer and you’ll see what lies beneath. It’s the regret that they’ve regressed to the mean. They wish they hadn’t lost what made them a bit mad. This is a sad thing.
Here’s something I’ve been thinking about. Businesses have: - CEOs - A board of directors - A vision - A 3-5 year strategy - Reporting and forecasting Imagine if we took our own life as seriously: - Understanding that you have complete agency and can do more than you think - Having a trusted circle of people to lean on - Creating a philosophy for life that you constructed (rather than adopted) - A set of values and associated actions that you believe in that guide your daily behaviours and life decisions - Reflections on whether you are living your philosophy as intended or whether something needs to change A thought inspired by the last month with @mussophilosophy
A quick reframe: Eating poorly shortens your life (but not because you die sooner). Each moment you live where you feel: - Unrested (because you ate right before bed) - Bloated (because you ate too much too fast) - Lethargic (because your plate was 90% carbs) - Sick (because your body lacks what it needs to protect you) Is like turning the ‘quality dial’ on your life from 100 to a 20 or a 30. And if you knowingly turn down the quality, did you really live that moment/hour/day as it should have been? Isn’t life already too short to be fiddling with the quality dial?
@metaLulie I'd be interested in joining please :)
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