The Big CIA @CalIntelAgency
Calgorithm Intelligence Agency. Destabilizing College Football since 1886 Berkeley, CA Joined April 2025-
Tweets142
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Followers118
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Following76
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Dearest Abigail— At your earliest convenience, please rendezvous with me at the garrison with preparations for extraction. We’re under fire from a well equipped battalion, led by a wild eyed, silver tongued riverboat captain by the name of Ronald, and I am frightened. — Andrew
@stanfballupdate @stanfordgarycat @wokemobfootball “Ackshewally, you Calgorithm burners just post the same old shit 80% of the time”
You gotta respect the furd band. It takes real dedication to consistently remain this auraless every single year.
BEARial complete. Big Game week officially on. 🪓
LIVE FROM LOUISVILLE
Nah twin, it wasn’t us
Breaking News Wetbeefs has been taken by Cal’s Leftist regime
@ToniGrowlzalez @wokemobfootball Show us your WR’s who can catch
@wokemobfootball Please delete this, it’s a matter of Calgorithm national security
@182747442A We need more than your statement, old man.
@182747442A We’ll be sending agents to your home promptly to take an incident report.
Official: UVA fan base will be classified as “beige curtains.” Not good, not bad. Just there. Some funny-ish, some lame and there’s a guy that really wants to spank me. Outside of that, they’re pretty boring.
@CalDeptOfState @CalAlumniLA @CalBand Classified information 💯
Well that fuckin sucked, time to go jack off
@DeusGreenie @wokemobfootball @TofuMonkey1 Agent Goldwater (aka Jordon Hudson) is a recently debriefed and declassified Calgorithm operative. Her intel was imperative to Cal’s victory last week. Assistant Director Oski handled Mr. Belichick personally during the game
We would again like to thank Agent Goldwater for her assistance against UNC. Tipping us off to the final play they were going to run so we could punch the ball out was absolutely invaluable. Go Bears!
We’re happy to announce we are now declassifying Jordon Hudson’s code name: Agent Goldwater. She’s a fellow Bear (from Bridgewater State) and has been leaking UNC strategies to us Below is a pic of our mole and her Cal handler (who is not @wokemobfootball) in disguise. Go Bears!
We’re happy to announce we are now declassifying Jordon Hudson’s code name: Agent Goldwater. She’s a fellow Bear (from Bridgewater State) and has been leaking UNC strategies to us Below is a pic of our mole and her Cal handler (who is not @wokemobfootball) in disguise. Go Bears!
Bordeaux, look man I respect the grind dog, but this is just an easy way to encourage students to get tickets to scalp to other students for a quick buck. If the prices were set to the same prices as what students usually pay for a ticket (plus the sites fees), I’d be kinda on board. But that’s clearly not the case, we can see that on the site in your video. Student seat is an easy way for a student to set up a system of scalping, pricing out students who actually want to attend the games but weren’t lucky enough to get a ticket through the usual lottery system.
Pressing the elderly into coaching in the @ACCFootball is now illegal in Bear Territory. Bill Belichick has been emancipated by the Calgorithm.
Agents, new mission from the head of the CIA. Ensure Student Seats is never used by students. Scalping hurts everyone, and ruins the fan experience.
We’re happy to announce we are now declassifying Jordon Hudson’s code name: Agent Goldwater. She’s a fellow Bear (from Bridgewater State) and has been leaking UNC strategies to us Below is a pic of our mole and her Cal handler (who is not @wokemobfootball) in disguise. Go Bears!
Honestly I had a couple this year I kinda went crazy with
Use this tweet as an excuse to post a picture where your body was insane
Please help us identify this enemy agent
weswatsonofficiial @weswatsono
16 Followers 349 Following $200M+ generated via email marketing & paid ads 📈Scaling businesses with proven systems
Attorney General Oski @CalAttGen
2 Followers 38 Following Proudly serving the great patriots of the Calgorithm since 1868
Paul @pbbvom
0 Followers 316 Following
Mark Blanton @barkmlanton
38 Followers 1K Following
tyler38 @tyler3812
1 Followers 178 Following
Gainfully Employed Ro... @Jube02
1K Followers 1K Following Gormful. Properly whelmed. Having feck. Plussed. In my lane. Moisturized. Flourishing.
Frater Hades.:. @AnalystPsy76751
48 Followers 2K Following Captain RJ Police Force Strategic Intelligence Analyst, Psychology Operations Analyst, Agroterrorism Intelligence Analyst, Antiterrorism intelligence Analyst...
Andrew D Brooks @andrewdbrooks
1K Followers 4K Following Business lawyer, JAG COL(CA)(Ret), Knight of St John, California native. 🚣🏻♂️🚴♂️🏊♂️This is a personal account; all opinions are mine alone. 🇺🇸🏳️🌈
Oski @GeneralOski
65 Followers 108 Following Commanding the 2–5th Regiment of the Calgorithmic Army and watching the Knicks during the off season
Has Stanfballupdate P... @furdfballupdate
54 Followers 158 Following Providing updates on the independent Stanfurd Football updater. Updates on when Alex posts about Cal since 2025. Onlyfans coming soon
RitaBellamy @5HOm1kjx86CTo
35 Followers 1K Following
Pollster Ex Machina @ExMachinaPolls
5 Followers 233 Following New polling questions that should be asked. Not just another 1-100 thermometer.
The Only Way Out Is T... @KingAmongDorks
542 Followers 1K Following I’ve been told “you should write a book about it” by various people in EXTREMELY different contexts.
vvn @gobearsism
1 Followers 89 Following
Avinash Kunnath @avinashkunnath
11K Followers 2K Following He/him. Fearless leader of @WriteForCal. #GoBears forever.
Wilcox’s Block C Ha... @WilcoxCHat
132 Followers 136 Following Hat of a Loyal Californian 🐻#Calgorithm
California We're For ... @girdedstalwarts
269 Followers 1K Following Love for all things Cal, especially Saturdays in Strawberry Canyon!
CAL BURNER PHONE @calburnerphone
83 Followers 285 Following
Mike Foiles @Quiet_Mike_
285 Followers 1K Following @QueensUniv, @NBCSAuthentic, @NBCSChicago, @KNBR, @GoldenBlogs, @BTNStudentU, University of Illinois '19
Keith Richard Salmine... @Cpl_Oaktown
2K Followers 3K Following @As_Fan_Radio (2003-2023) | 30th Gov. of @tightwadhill23 | Co-Founder of 'The Bear Raid' podcast | @USMC Vet | @ForeverOakland_
Brick Morse @docsuess84
505 Followers 381 Following I’m just here for the Calgorithm. My schtick is retro because it imparts joy. Go Bears. Go Sharks.
GoBears96 @calderon11
2K Followers 5K Following Born & raised in the East Bay ... Passionate about my kids, my Cal Bears, politics, & social justice. Cal & UCLA Alum #GoBears
Alison Scott 🐻 @bnosilagm
280 Followers 991 Following
Tightwad Hill @tightwadhill23
2K Followers 3K Following Official Twitter account of 'The greatest place on Earth to watch @CalFootball FOR FREE since 11/24/1923!' | Official sponsor of 'The Bear Raid' podcast
Oski’s Left Hand @NumberOneCalFan
174 Followers 313 Following Fighting the good fight 🤺 | CAL ‘26 🐻 | RIP PAC-12 🪦
BJ Canady Fan @Cal_Foosball
21 Followers 128 Following Every “we’re so back” needs its “it’s so over”
PKC @96calgrad
163 Followers 2K Following Just a simple girl who loves football and shoes. Cal '96, Indiana '04.
Barry Jive @Hail_Slayton
162 Followers 472 Following
Calgorithm Department... @Calgorithm_DOL
110 Followers 18 Following
International Calgori... @CalgorithmCourt
78 Followers 35 Following Serving justice for the Calgorithm.
Calgorithm Craft Coun... @CalgoCraft
113 Followers 66 Following Spreading the word of Craft Beer across the Calgorithm.
Calgorithm Dept of St... @CalDeptOfState
224 Followers 456 Following Leading Calgorithm foreign policy and diplomacy since 1868. The Whole Damn World Is Bear Territory!
Holy Oski Crusader @OskiCrusader
91 Followers 157 Following At our Lord Popes Command. Published Author. We Bring The Power Of The Lord Pope And Dark Lord Oski. We Shall Smite The Heathens Destroy Everything In Our Path.
Calgorithm Department... @CalgoKenergy
23 Followers 23 Following Blue and Gold make Green energy. Committed to Restoring California’s Energy Dominance - FIAT POTENTIAE - Led by @Coachjasonnovak (Secretary of Kenergy)
Dialoni Padzalez @ToniGrowlzalez
232 Followers 423 Following TOSH 7:15 Roll on you Bears!!! Roll on you Burners - and Roll on some deodorant ACC foes.-Nonballnary Golden Bear (Pronouns: Grrr, Rah, Grr-rr-rr-rah )
Drowrog @Drowrog562
63 Followers 604 Following
Calgorithm ATF @Calgorithm_ATF
44 Followers 11 Following Managing the booze, the smokes and the booms of the Calgorithm
Write for California @WriteForCal
9K Followers 1K Following From the founders of California Golden Blogs. "If you bleed blue and gold... the fine folks at Write For California are there to serve." — @MikeSilver
Marshall Cherrington @MWCherrington
48K Followers 5K Following Assistant General Manager, @CalFootball | #GoBears🐻 | WA➡️CA
Calgorithm Department... @Calgorithm_DOL
110 Followers 18 Following
Calgorithm Dept of St... @CalDeptOfState
224 Followers 456 Following Leading Calgorithm foreign policy and diplomacy since 1868. The Whole Damn World Is Bear Territory!
Calgorithm Department... @CalgoKenergy
23 Followers 23 Following Blue and Gold make Green energy. Committed to Restoring California’s Energy Dominance - FIAT POTENTIAE - Led by @Coachjasonnovak (Secretary of Kenergy)
International Calgori... @CalgorithmCourt
78 Followers 35 Following Serving justice for the Calgorithm.
Calgorithm Craft Coun... @CalgoCraft
113 Followers 66 Following Spreading the word of Craft Beer across the Calgorithm.
Calgorithm Teacher As... @CalgoTeachers
66 Followers 27 Following Helping educate and "reducate" the public about the glory of the Calgorithm.
Stanford Tracker @TrackFurd
140 Followers 37 Following Tracking political candidates and government officials who go to, attended, or graduated from @Stanford and their invasive influence in American politics.
Calgorithm Department... @Calgorithm_DOT
88 Followers 24 Following Keeping the Calgorithm and the Woke Agenda moving forward, all in service to Dark Lord Oski
Strawberry Creek Yach... @Chop_That_Tree
43 Followers 225 Following Sort of meme Account. @CalFootball and Oski stan. Tree Chopping Enjoyer.
Berkeley People’s L... @CGBPLA
123 Followers 191 Following Paramilitary wing of the California Golden Bears fanbase. Posts do not represent the official views of anyone and cannot legally be used to get mad at me
Allen L. @Leibochips
1K Followers 4K Following Techie, IRONMAN triathlete, Cal sports fan. Here for fun stuff like Star Wars & Star Trek but will take on antisemites and other bigots. RT/follow ≠ endorsement
Rajiv @LawTeck
533 Followers 969 Following 🟦 🐻 🟨 🪓 Go Bears. Calgorithm. YIMBY. Tech lawyer. Create wealth; keep some for yourself.
GrumpyBear @GrumpyCalBear
336 Followers 762 Following Angry and Pissed Off Cal Bear Fan #CalGang #ComeToCal
Myla 🐻 @CalFan92
414 Followers 899 Following Mother, wife, teacher, UC Berkeley alum, and sports fan. #GoBears! #GoPackGo! #Packers owner 🇵🇭
ROLL ON YOU BEERS @Beer_Belly_Bear
116 Followers 170 Following Cal sicko. Oski’s 2nd cousin 23 times removed (often forcibly). Please sing the Drinking Song on my birthday. GO BEARS!
psst @itstheredman
154 Followers 608 Following Cal, dubs, giants, niners, stugotz. Intermittent void whispering. used to move frosted flakes like kellogg
Scoutmaster Oski, @di... @CalgorithmScout
276 Followers 615 Following Calgorithm Scouts of America | @dialpad advocate | Professional Submarine Fighter Pilot | Former @NASAInterns | @msbgu | #calgorithm #siouxyeahyeah #inhoc
Dialpad Propagandist @AGuyNamedNam
3K Followers 2K Following English teacher, @Cal romantic, Tottenham sufferer | he/him | @onlenams | telling the story, because I know it.
Bishop Desmond @B1sh0pDesmond
349 Followers 214 Following Self-proclaimed Bishop of The Church of CMS. Servant of the people. Cub of Oski.
Golden Bear Report (O... @CalBearsOn3
16K Followers 3K Following In-depth coverage of Cal football, basketball, recruiting and athletics. Part of the On3 Network. Publisher: @thomasdunn24
Thomas Dunn @Thomasdunn24
2K Followers 598 Following Cal @On3 @CalBearsOn3. Host of Bleav in Cal, co-host of @unoffwccpod. Writing @frontstretch, PxP 🎙️, @santaclarauniv and @serrasanmateo alum. 🇮🇪 🇦🇹🇬🇹
The Only Way Out Is T... @KingAmongDorks
543 Followers 1K Following I’ve been told “you should write a book about it” by various people in EXTREMELY different contexts.
Flip @OskiAcolyte
11 Followers 117 Following Recovering Cal Football addict, back on a bender mainlining the Calgorithm.
Supreme Commander Bea... @JahvidMacBest
204 Followers 126 Following Losh Tupoi’s agent; a man of inaction
Justin @Justin_WDE
734 Followers 638 Following Split G’s: 33 | Auburn BSCI Alum | Avid SpaceX fan | Town Hall 16 | Acclaimed as the best Auburn fan by the Calgorithm
🅱️IAL🅱️AD �... @BearsBy50
746 Followers 566 Following (we/us/ours) spreading the pro-Dialpad agenda since 1868 (private account, all views my own)
MalörtBjörn @MalortBjorn
85 Followers 303 Following
Grant Marek @Grant_Marek
9K Followers 7K Following @sfgate Editor-in-Chief | Cal Bear | @dailycal Board Member | ✉️ [email protected] | 🦋 https://t.co/ZfsR90EDCP | Signal: grantmarek.83
atoms @atomsareenough
1K Followers 2K Following Into: college sports (Cal 🐻, Syracuse 🍊), ⚾️ (Dodgers), current events, music, aviation, random silliness.
Liam @KoreAmBear
2K Followers 4K Following No/So Cal, Hawaii. Dodgers, Cal, Clippers, #Calgorithm, Oasis and The Strokes. 80s/90s alt-rock bands that played on KROQ & Live 105.
mpete91 @mpete91
1K Followers 639 Following he/him | Oskientologist | Purveyor of Organic Handmade Shitposts | Published Author | Oski Photoshopper | Sticker Enthusiast | @WriteForCal Typer
“Third Leg Greg” ... @ItsThirdLegGreg
393 Followers 289 Following Former Cal Kicker with a massive *third* leg
PUT YOUR (CAL) HAT ON @ToshingMyLupoi
2K Followers 4K Following Shadow Business Development @ Cal Athletics
Calivia Rodrigo Mk. 2 @GumboCoys
962 Followers 2K Following dumbest person ever admitted to UC Berkeley
Daniel Gamboa♿️ @DanielGamboaDC
353 Followers 591 Following former sports editor @dailycal, Cal ‘25, Tottenham Hotspur.
Tell The Whole Damn W... @Win4Cal
1K Followers 510 Following Ahmad Anderson and Reza Sirafinejad host the YouTube show/podcast that celebrates all things Cal! GO BEARS! #CalgorithmYou might like
