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Tweets2K
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Followers1K
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Following204
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Likes8K
Never forget
@adidasoriginals Purchase page won’t load for Gucci Gazelles on Confirmed app. Been trying since release on 8/25 - tech issue or shipment delay?
all I'm saying is that President Email Lady wouldn't be telling us to drink bleach
So excited for the season finale of America.
Walgreen’s is playing “Hong Kong Garden.” There’s hope for humanity yet.
@phelpsroadclub HOW DID I NOT KNOW YOU WERE PRODUCING TRUE TORI THIS IS AMAZING SO MANY QUESTIONS
@SortaBad @sweet_toof what up Butthole Club circa 2011
@sweet_toof dude. JOHN GOODMAN READ WHAT YOU WROTE ABOUT HIS BALL GREASE ON TV.
@sweet_toof Here’s John Goodman reading your tweet on Kimmel tonight: moby.to/6nx86v
“Wrong number” would have been appropriate, but where’s the fun in that? Meet Corey, my new foreverbro.
If you leave the mall today without two black eyes and a stranger’s earlobe in your mouth, you’ve missed the point of America entirely.
People who wear Bluetooth headsets always look like the people least likely to ever receive phone calls.
Ted Travelstead @trumpetcake
43K Followers 4K Following I'm not everyone's cup of teeth. https://t.co/97Pa1xYSHh
Ecstasy @CoffeeTat2
9 Followers 61 Following Some people like what I tweet. Some don’t. Statistically, you probably won’t.
Kevin J Hand @KevinJHand2
2 Followers 70 Following
DUO Creative Communic... @duocreative1
39 Followers 85 Following Media production company covering Japan and the U.S.
SUSTO MEZCAL @SUSTOMEZCAL
183 Followers 1K Following Text SUSTO to 50448 to join our COSMOS💫 #hechoenoaxaca #enjoyedinaustin
GOODNIGHT LOVING VODK... @GLVontherocks
148 Followers 1K Following Now available at liquor stores across Central Texas. Drink Responsibly. #ShareTheLoving
Professional Podcast ... @supaymx
17 Followers 885 Following
james @james06072562
20 Followers 2K Following
elizabethpilcher @elizpilcher
5 Followers 28 Following Lover of words and rhetoric. Current University of Southern California Masters of Communication Management student.
The Black Trolls @black_trolls
173 Followers 1K Following G and dIMPS. interracial podcast. we troll people. bullshit artists. upscale freaks. https://t.co/jbnlXQQFQx
Sukniod @sukniod
105 Followers 993 Following
CamiQ @camaria14
74 Followers 413 Following
rachael @rachaelmannion
112 Followers 2K Following don't stop imagining, the day that you do is the day that you die.
Dan Small @dansmall81
64 Followers 2K Following
Lola James @loladjames
1 Followers 146 Following
Noot Gingrich @nootropicnewt
294 Followers 1K Following ALPHA GOP ON ALPHA GPC WRITES STACKS OF BOOKS AND BOOKS OF STACKS
Ma'ati Diallo @oskidiakoski
20 Followers 319 Following
XSIVE1 Inc. @XSIVE1
276 Followers 2K Following Creating actionable solutions through strategic consulting.
Jennifer DeKievit @JenDeKievit
179 Followers 1K Following Striving to be a peace loving, tree hugging mom. Looking for knowledge, wit, and positivity in this mad, mad, mad, mad world that makes me mad...
SuperYogaMedia @superyogamedia
183 Followers 721 Following Imaginary Yoga Classes || Follow us on IG @superyogamedia
a Pun Cast @punk_assed
473 Followers 2K Following Hosted by award-winning pun brothers Jerzy (@jgwz) and Jordan Gwiazdowski. Listen on Spotify, iTunes, and everywhere.
Rocco Corporation @RoccosRolloff
10 Followers 56 Following 410-342-3939 - We off dumpster rental services commercial/residential throughout the Baltimore area we are also a full service demo contractor call today
Mike Russell @culturepulp
3K Followers 4K Following Occasional writer/cartoonist ( @SabertoothVamp ). Former other things.
yaren tuzak @GokinYaren
44 Followers 327 Following
CHILDBIRTH @childbrrrth
2K Followers 1K Following SUPERGROUP (members of @CHAST1TYBELT, @TacocaTs and @ononosband) Our album Women's Rights is out right now on Suicide Squeeze!
aynur kalkan @053_kalkan
1 Followers 19 Following
CHMR @chmrmunradio
2K Followers 481 Following Memorial University's campus/community radio, providing diverse radio programming to St. John's, NL on 93.5 FM, Aliant 825, Rogers 942, and over the internet.
gloria botelho @glorbot
44 Followers 160 Following https://t.co/ITwoTLzx5H https://t.co/abRl040Nae https://t.co/iow5iUhgYT
geoffrey slater @geoffslater07
0 Followers 26 Following
matt tuff @matttuff
4K Followers 475 Following This is all make believe like Bernoulli and his stupid principle.
The Melody Life @TalaricoMel
506 Followers 2K Following Aka Amputtee #SFFF for vids n pics Of mylife n Diversity Of Entertainment @melbatoast42 Instagram #MelodyIsMusicGroup on FB #OpenToAllMusic
Tbaby @TbabyCold
271 Followers 1K Following My One and only official twitter!!! Its So Cold in The D, Tbaby. Hottest Rapper out of Detroit Serious Business Inquiries: [email protected]
Beavis_in_Buckhead �... @bernbuzz
124 Followers 271 Following Libertarian, Seeker of Truth, Cigar Aficionado, Single Malt Scotch & Bourbon Lover and All Around Good Guy
Springfish @springfish
172 Followers 415 Following If I could get the lid off, I'd look into the jar.
April Donovan @seehereyou
359 Followers 706 Following Writer. Rapper. Artist. 🎤 AP Real 🎶 Funky Cranium + Vitamin D #aprealart https://t.co/2jzi2NbIVx https://t.co/7GLIOgnlCa
Wiscon @wisconseattle
217 Followers 627 Following The divorce was your fault, kids. https://t.co/9To01I3AYV
Neil J. Connole @zmanconnole
0 Followers 4 Following
💙💚schmattamench @Pinklunall
469 Followers 4K Following
Northern Virginia Dep... @NoVADeplorable
604 Followers 2K Following Please view my pinned post. 51/Roman Catholic. Husband, father, son, friend.
donni saphire @donni
54K Followers 1K Following I make the toast of a bread situation. Still posting daily on Bluesky and mastodon
Megan Amram @meganamram
882K Followers 4K Following it's this weird, sexual, anti-comedy comedy that's 'in' right now. - my mom
Ted Travelstead @trumpetcake
43K Followers 4K Following I'm not everyone's cup of teeth. https://t.co/97Pa1xYSHh
lauren ashley bishop @sbellelauren
47K Followers 1K Following comedy writer. comedy performer. mother of all dogs. AR native. @sbellelauren on threads, IG, and tiktok. also https://t.co/oZPcpNvYbG
COLD CARD X SUPPORT T... @COLDCARDX
12K Followers 455 Following Sleep at Night Technology! Ultra-secure Hardware Wallet for #Bitcoin The only dedicated air-gapped. Backup on SEEDPLATE f/ @Coinkite
Waymo @Waymo
140K Followers 226 Following The world's first fully autonomous ride-hailing service. Over 20M trips served and counting. 🚙 Need assistance? Send us a DM.
Rick Mitchell @ItsRickMitchell
12K Followers 2K Following Writer/Comedian, Ellen DeGeneres Show, TMZ, Laughs on Fox. I can write a funny speech for you! https://t.co/NKXtxach9C
Steve Neavling @MCmuckraker
26K Followers 3K Following Steve Neavling is an investigative reporter at Metro Times & creator of Motor City Muckraker, an independent watchdog news site. He also covers cannabis.
Jessie 🦇 @NicCageMatch
29K Followers 773 Following What, this old thing? // “can’t believe how strange it is to be anything at all”
Joey Mueller @TraderJoeCEO
51K Followers 11K Following Tweets, views and opinions are my own, NOT those of Trader Joe’s.
Quinn Katherman @QuinnK
3K Followers 511 Following Professional bang haver. Director @PRETTYBIRDPIC.
elkion @elkion
31 Followers 47 Following
Halli Borgfjord @HalliB
1K Followers 743 Following Comedian. Trader. Former big-four accounting firm dropout.
Ryan Burkett @blackbeltjonz
1K Followers 888 Following Chicago comedy, writer, co-host of The Music Video Podcast, he/him https://t.co/aLhcGjl0Xa
Tacocat @TacocaTs
8K Followers 1K Following Seattle Band. Hijinks. Follow our instagram 📸 @Tacocatband
Lena Dunham @lenadunham
4.5M Followers 635 Following Famesick is out April 14!! You can pre-order now
Vasculitis Vixen™ @MistookMistake
6K Followers 1K Following When I'm not busy losing 15lbs. so I can fit behind my fridge to get an M&M, I'm tweeting jokes, writing a book, & speaking about my cause: beating Vasculitis.
/ @katiefzack
3K Followers 525 Following
Jeff @jefftminston
934 Followers 282 Following Man of Science. I can perform cold fusion or alien autopsies with equal aplomb.
Patricia Lockwood @TriciaLockwood
92K Followers 990 Following hardcore berenstain bare-it-all | [email protected]
R Dot @FrankLongo
2K Followers 201 Following won two Oscars under the pseudonym Hilary Swank. i don't tweet.
𝗖𝗩𝗥𝗥𝗩 @CVRRVxyz
4K Followers 170 Following
Matt Selman @mattselman
37K Followers 778 Following Executive Producer / Show Runner The Simpsons @TheSimpsons #TheSimpsons
Julius Sharpe @juliussharpe
119K Followers 325 Following Prominent figure in the bald community, creator of two cancelled TV shows, and worst-selling author. Buy my book, “So You’re Going Bald!” at link below.
Every Tweet Ever @EveryTweet_Ever
36K Followers 364 Following Pretty much every tweet you already have seen and will ever see. All of us could stand to be a little more creative. Created and written by @ChrisSerico.
Allen Strickland Will... @TotallyAllen
20K Followers 3K Following Comics Unleashed. Conan. Adult Swim. Comedy Central special The Intellectual Shocker on YouTube. Order my album Ran Through on vinyl and digital below.
Andrew @AMNelson999
263 Followers 76 Following
Jon Friedman @friedmanjon
52K Followers 4K Following
Todd Marrone @toddmarrone
2K Followers 337 Following It was the best of timelines, it was the worst of timelines.
Shelby @smelbz
4K Followers 760 Following I write words for money and I love it (the money). All teeth.
David @DavidKlein5
3K Followers 648 Following You can make a million dollars just by singing the blues.
her porkness 🐽 @MoistPork
13K Followers 594 Following
MJ Leonard @ObscuraMentis
2K Followers 1K Following 40 something professional weirdo, rejected blood donor. Northerner, Newfoundlander, reluctant human being. 🍁
Bryan Donaldson @TheNardvark
39K Followers 705 Following I write penis jokes that a handsome man reads on tv




































